


Through the Looking Glass

by The Neon Gang (clgfanfic)



Series: Magnificent Seven (TV series) - Shattered AU [1]
Category: The Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, BDSM elements, Genital Torture, M/M, Magnificent Seven AU: ATF, Psychological Torture, Sadism, Torture, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-20
Updated: 2014-06-21
Packaged: 2018-02-05 12:34:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 18
Words: 37,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1818712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clgfanfic/pseuds/The%20Neon%20Gang
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A sadistic voyeur forces Vin to perform for him in order to keep Chris alive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Call

**Author's Note:**

> We're listing this as a M/M story even though Vin and Chris won't realize their relationship in this story. It will happen.

**May 1998, a Saturday**

**8:23 a.m.**

Vin arrived at Larabee's ranch, parking in the empty driveway and climbing out of his Jeep. He leaned into the back of the vehicle and pulled out his duffel bag, then closed the door and locked it out of habit. He glanced around, enjoying the crisp air and the bright blue sky that stretched out above him, drawing his gaze to the mountains that rose up from the foothills marking the edge of Larabee's property. It was a breathtaking sight, and he couldn't help but enjoy it every time he saw it.

Walking to the front door of the large, rambling ranch house, he glanced around, trying to make out whether Larabee's Ram was parked inside the barn. He couldn't see it, but he knew that didn't mean it wasn't in there.

He checked his watch. He was nearly half an hour early, so there was no reason Larabee should have been here to meet him.

After knocking and getting no response, he tried the doorbell, thinking Chris might still be in the shower. That thought set off a fission reaction of desire deep in his groin, and he quickly hurried it away, knowing those thoughts could only lead to pain.

He pushed the bell again.

Still nothing…

Frowning, he dropped his duffel beside the door and turned, crossing the driveway and walking out to the barn. "Hey, Chris," he called, but was met by soft whickers from the horses that were still standing in their stalls.

His frown deepening, Vin walked over to the first of those stalls and gave Pony a scratch between the ears. "Hey, fella," he greeted the horse. "Where's Chris, huh?"

Large brown eyes stared back at him.

Vin took a few minutes to let the horses out into their pasture, then cleaned up their stalls before heading back to the house. He knocked and rang the doorbell again, and when he got no response, he fished into his pocket and pulled out his key ring, using his copy of Larabee's front-door key to let himself into the man's home.

The fact that he even had that key still amazed him, but Vin was grateful for the trust it showed Larabee had in him. It had been so long since he'd allowed himself to get close to someone, to a group of men he worked with…

He shook his head, chasing away the thoughts. The past was the past, and it was over. All he had to think about now was the future, and the present.

He made a quick check of the house, finding the bed made in the master bedroom, the shower damp, and a half pot of coffee still sitting in the Mr. Coffee machine in the kitchen.

So, Chris _had_ been there earlier, but he wasn't there now.

Vin backtracked through the house, looking for a note, but he didn't find one. He did find a present sitting on Larabee's desk in the man's home office, and wondered if one of the other men on the team was having a birthday soon. No one had said anything, but Chris would know all of their birthdays, even if they hadn't had an opportunity to uncover those themselves just yet.

Four months… He shook his head, had it really only been four months since he'd joined the team? It was hard to believe.

Hell, harder still to think that the team had only been together for five months. Chris had pulled together Buck, Josiah and Nathan back in early January. JD had followed a week later, and Ezra had been brought in before the end of the month. He had been the last to join, and that was in early February. At first he hadn't been sure he'd fit in, but his instant bond with Larabee had kept him there, kept him trying. And it really hadn't been all that long before he'd made a place for himself with the other men.

Now, just a few months later, he felt like he had friends, family – brothers. It was frightening and wonderful, all at the same time. And they were each so different.

Vin forced his attention back to the task at hand.

So, either Larabee had headed off for something and had expected to be back quickly, or he'd been forced to leave before he could turn off the coffeepot and leave Vin a note. _That_ sounded like something work-related.

Grabbing the receiver from the phone hanging on the wall in the kitchen, he punched out Buck's number and waited for someone to pick up.

 _"Hello,"_ greeted the ladies' man.

"Hey, Buck, it's Vin. Y' hear from Chris this morning?"

 _"Nope. Why?"_ came the immediate response. _"This my day to watch him?"_

Vin grinned. "Naw, he asked me to come over 'round nine, so we can work on that west fence, but he's not here. Thought something might 'a come up at work."

 _"Naw, I doubt it. He would've called me if it had. He probably went over to pick up something for breakfast from that new bread place they put in over there by him,"_ the ladies' man offered.

From all the clinks and bangs Vin could hear in the background, he guessed Buck was in the middle of fixing breakfast himself. "Yeah, that's probably it," he replied, but the soft buzz of worry in his gut kept him from really believing it.

 _"You two have fun doin' all that hard work today,"_ Buck said and chuckled. _"Me, I've got a date later with Miss Hillary, that pretty little blonde down in records. Mmm, mmm, mmm…"_ The line went dead.

Vin returned the receiver to its cradle and stood there, glancing around the kitchen. Nothing else was out of place, and even if it was unusual for Chris to leave the coffeemaker on when he was gone, it could have been an oversight. Besides, if he was expecting Vin in half an hour, he might have just left it on purposefully. After all, he usually hit Larabee up for coffee as soon as he walked in the door.

Hell, he was just being paranoid, he told himself. After all, he'd _only_ known the man four months.

Long enough to fall in love, granted, but not long enough to really know what was "normal" for the man, and what wasn't. But then there was that tiny voice, the one whispering inside his head, telling him he _did_ know, and something was wrong.

Very damn wrong.

With a sigh, Vin left the kitchen and headed back to the living room. The hanging curtain shade had been pulled all the way open, and he looked out past the sliding glass doors and across the landscape to the mountains beyond the mostly flat green pastures. It really was a breathtaking view, and one he never tired of seeing. Larabee was a damn lucky man, having a place like this.

Vin frowned slightly. The curtains in the master bedroom had been open, too, as had the ones in the kitchen, the spare room, and in the office. That was different. Wasn't it?

Vin couldn't remember having ever seen them all opened like this before, but who was to say Larabee hadn't decided to air the place out later, or maybe he'd just decided the day was too beautiful to leave the curtains closed. Still, the sniper had to admit, it was a little odd, and it left him with the lingering feeling of being in a fishbowl.

He turned, glancing around the room again, that alarm in his gut telling him he ought to leave – now. But that made no sense.

The phone rang, two different tones coming from the phones in the kitchen and the living room, both competing for his attention. The wireless on the table by the sofa was the closest, so Vin grabbed that one.

"Chris?" he asked.

 _"Good morning, Vin,"_ a voice greeted. _"I want you to listen carefully. I have Agent Larabee here with me, and if you don't follow my instructions, to the letter, I'll be forced to punish him. Do you understand?"_

"Who is this?" Vin demanded, scowling.

_"I asked you if you understood."_

"I heard you," Vin replied, almost snapping at the caller. "How do I know you have Larabee?"

There was a pause, then Chris' voice came over the line, asking, _"Vin? This ass—"_

"Who—?"

 _"Convinced now?"_ the voice asked. It was a man's voice, but it wasn't one Vin recognized. It was smooth, cultured, kind of like Ezra's, but without the Southern accent.

"What the hell do y' want?" Vin demanded, his own accent thickening slightly as fear and anger began to build.

_"Well, that's rather complicated, but you'll understand, eventually. Right now, I just want you to take off your shirt."_

"What?"

_"You heard me, Vin. Take off your shirt, now, or I'll punish Agent Larabee."_

It was said so matter-of-factly that Vin hesitated. Why in the world would the caller want him to take off his shirt? And how would the caller know if he did it or not? "All right," he said, hoping to bluff the man.

The voice tsked at him over the line, then Vin heard a sharp whooshing sound, followed by a solid thwacking noise, like the slap of a hand against bare flesh. He also heard Chris yelp loudly in response.

"Chris!" he barked into the phone. "Chris!"

_"Agent Larabee was punished, Vin. I'm afraid my crop left a rather large welt on his back. I'm sure it stings terribly. Now, take off your shirt, or I'll have to punish him again."_

The voice sounded sterner this time, and Tanner set the wireless phone down, muttering soft curses under his breath as he unbuttoned the flannel shirt he was wearing, pulling it off and tossing it across the back of the sofa. Grabbing the phone again, he snapped, "All right, damn it, it's off."

_"Yes, I can see that. Very good, Vin."_

Tanner's head swiveled as his gaze shot from one window in the living room to another in the well-illuminated space. _Shit_. The caller could be out there anywhere with high-powered field glasses, or even a small telescope, watching his every move.

_"Now, I want you to remove your T-shirt as well."_

The voice had returned to what Vin was already thinking of as a "normal" tone. He scowled, but he set the phone down and pulled the short-sleeved white tee over his head, tossing it down beside his flannel shirt. Bare-chested now, he grabbed the phone, demanding, "What d' ya want?"

 _"Hmm, what a wonderful body you have, Vin,"_ the voice said, ignoring the question. _"It's everything I imagined it would be – more, in fact."_

"Where's Chris?" Vin demanded, feeling his palms beginning to sweat. He didn't like the sound of that in the slightest.

_"He's here, safe, with me. And as long as you continue to cooperate, he'll stay that way. I shouldn't have to tell you this, but if you hang up on me, or disobey me, or attempt to contact the police or other members of your team, I'll have to punish Agent Larabee very severely. A few punishments of that sort and I'm afraid he might not survive. Do you understand?"_

"I hear you," Vin replied, his mind racing. He still had his own cell phone in the pocket of his jeans, but if the man behind the voice really was watching him the way he seemed to be, he would see him using it – unless he could get into a room where there was a blind spot, or no windows, like the bathroom off the master bedroom.

_"Good, very good, Vin. I knew you'd want to please me."_

"I want m' friend left alone," he snapped back at the voice.

_"As long as you continue to obey me, Agent Larabee will be left untouched, you have my word on that. Now, I want you to set the phone down and remove the rest of your clothes. Everything, Vin."_

"What?" Tanner swallowed hard, his stomach doing a little flip-flop.

"You heard me, Vin. Don't make me punish Agent Larabee again."

Tanner set the phone down on the small end table and reached down, untying his shoelaces and pulling off his shoes. Next, he reached for the buttons on his faded jeans and popped them open, pulling his pants down and stepping out of them. He laid them over the back of the sofa next to his T-shirt and flannel, making sure that the pocket where his phone rested was available, just in case he could use it. Socks came next, then, after a brief hesitation, he hooked his thumbs under the waistband of his briefs and pulled them off as well.

Goose pimples broke out across his skin when he picked up the phone again and heard the man moan softly before he said, _"Oh, yes, you are stunning, Vin, truly exquisite. Has Agent Larabee made love to you yet?"_

"What?" Tanner nearly yelped.

 _"Has he touched you?"_ the voice inquired.

"No," Vin replied, his voice going a little thick. It was what he'd wanted Chris to do for weeks, hell, months – almost from the first day he'd seen the man – but he didn't think his desires would ever be anything more than a fantasy he allowed himself to indulge in from time to time, while he jacked off in bed, or in the shower.

 _"A shame,"_ the voice replied, sounding almost sorry for him. _"Have any of the others?"_

"No," Vin replied, his tone half-indignant, half-annoyed.

_"Poor pet. A body like that should be worshiped, and made love to – often. Where would you want Agent Larabee to touch you first, Vin?"_

"I don't—"

_"Ah-ah-ah, there will be no secrets, no lies between us, Vin. Tell me, what would you like him to touch first?"_

Vin hesitated for just a second, then forced out, "M' lips."

_"You'd want him to touch your lips first? Mmm, your lips are beautiful. Would you want him to run his fingers over them, kiss them…?"_

"Yes," Tanner replied in a tight whisper, his cheeks burning hotly with embarrassment and shame.

_"Which?"_

"B-Both," Tanner forced out, silently praying Larabee couldn't hear what he was saying. If he could, it might just destroy the friendship they had built so quickly, and so easily.

_"Mmm… Show me, Vin. Show me how you want him to touch your lips."_

He couldn't. He just couldn't. Vin shook his head. "What's this all about?" he snapped, trying to distance himself from his own mounting desires.

 _"Wrong, Vin,"_ the voice stated harshly, and Tanner heard the sound of the crop falling again, the _pop_ as it made contact with Chris' flesh, and the startled cry that escaped the blond's throat as a result.

Vin cursed softly, but he said, "Like this, damn it!"

Reaching up, he ran his fingertips lightly over his upper lip, then down and back over his lower one. He'd dreamed about Chris touching him like that, just before he leaned in and touched his lips to his…

_"Oh, yes, that's better, Vin, much better. Would you kiss his fingers if he touched you like that?"_

"Yes," Tanner said, his eyes closing and his voice falling quiet again. He could feel the blush that had broken out across his body.

_"Yes, I think you would. Keep your eyes closed, Vin. Show me how you'd kiss his fingers while he was touching you."_

Vin held the phone to his ear with one hand and, with the other, he reached up, tracing his lips again. Only this time when he reached the corner of his bottom lip, he ran his finger back to the center and then kissed his fingertip, lightly.

_"Mmm, yes, that was perfect. Suck your finger into your mouth, Vin…"_

Tanner's lips parted, then closed around his finger as he pushed it into his mouth. His expression, however, made it more than clear that he was fighting hard to keep his stomach from turning over.

 _"Oh, yes, you'd suck on his finger just like that, wouldn't you? All the way in,"_ the voice instructed, and Vin obeyed. _"Make it good and wet, Vin… That's right… Now, open your mouth… Good boy. Lick your finger… make it drip… Yes, that's right. Now, close your lips, Vin… Good. Pull your finger out, slowly… slowly… Mmm… yes…"_

Vin did as he was instructed, his eyes squeezing shut tighter, his cheeks turning a bright shade of red. As much as he hated it, he could feel his cock beginning to stir to life.

_"Agent Larabee has a speaker option on that phone, Vin. I want you to set it down in the charger and turn on the speaker. Do it now."_

Vin slid the phone back into the charger and hunted for the correct button, pressing it when he found it.

_"You're doing well, Vin. Now, I want you to run your hand down over your chest… Yes, just like that… I know you wish that it was Agent Larabee's hand, don't you?"_

"Yes," Vin replied, his throat going tight. He felt like he might be sick, but he knew he had to play this asshole's game, at least until he could figure out a way to get to his cell phone and call for help. No way was he letting this creep hurt Chris again, not if he could help it.

_"Now, reach up with both hands and touch your tits, Vin… Mmm, yes, that's right… Squeeze them… Pull on them… Oh, yes, that's right… Squeeze… Harder… Harder, Vin… There, good. Now, keep playing with one of your tits, but reach down with your other hand and take hold of your balls…"_

Vin couldn't help it, his hand hesitated, and he heard the lash fall on Chris' back again. "Stop it!" he yelled, his hand immediately dropping to cup his balls, his budding arousal gone. Christ, he had to act immediately when the voice told him to do something or else Chris was going to get hurt, and he had no idea how bad a strike could be.

_"No hesitation, Vin, I want you to respond as soon as I tell you what to do, or Agent Larabee will feel the consequences of your disobedience. Do you hear me?"_

"Leave him alone," Vin pleaded, his voice tight with anger now.

_"As long as you please me, I will leave Agent Larabee alone. Fail to please me, and he will suffer for it."_

Vin's lips pressed into a thin line of rage, but there was nothing he could do to protect Chris except go along with whatever this pervert wanted him to do. He glanced around the room, wishing there was some way to escape, but there wasn't. And he didn't dare just walk out; there was no telling what the bastard might do to Chris.

_"Now, squeeze your balls, Vin… Yes, that's good… Roll them in your palm… Mmm, yes, very nice. But look, your cock's still soft."_

The voice sounded disappointed. "This ain't my idea of a good time," Tanner snapped, glad the first blush of arousal had died when he'd heard the crop fall for the third time.

 _"It had better become your idea,"_ the voice warned him sternly, _"and quickly. Now, take hold of your shaft and squeeze it… Good. Spit in your hand and stroke yourself… Think about him, Vin. Imagine that it's Agent Larabee's hand on your cock, right now, gliding up and down… his thumb, rubbing over the head… Yes, that's better, much better… Now, leave your tit alone and put your finger back in your mouth while you continue to stroke yourself…"_

Vin did as told, one hand continuing to work his cock, which was slightly aroused, but a far cry from erect.

 _"You're not concentrating,"_ the voice scolded him, and Chris yelled and grunted as two more blows fell in quick succession.

"I can't!" Vin cried, pulling the finger from his mouth. "Please, don't hurt 'im. 'M doin' what y' told me."

_"Oh, yes, you can, Vin. You must. And I'll tell you why. I'm setting my crop aside, and I'm picking up another one of my toys. I have many toys, you know. This one is among my favorites."_

There was a pause and then Vin heard the sharp crack of a whip. There was no cry from Chris, so the sniper knew the man had only cracked it in the air. He could imagine the fear Larabee must be feeling, and knew he had to go along with whatever the voice told him or his friend might be badly hurt.

_"Now, you don't want me to use this on him, do you?"_

"No," Vin replied, unable to keep the slightly begging tone out of his voice. "Please, I can't help it, I—"

_"Just do what I tell you, Vin, and Agent Larabee will be fine."_

"I'm _trying_ , but—"

_"I want you to walk back to Agent Larabee's office. Remember, I'll be able to see you in the room, so don't try anything foolish. There's a box on Agent Larabee's desk. I want you to get that box and take it back to the living room. Don't open it. You have fifteen seconds, starting… now."_

Vin hurried from the room, heading straight to the office. He saw the twelve-inch-square red box in the center of Chris' desk and grabbed it, hurrying back to the living room with it. So much for it being a gift for someone.

"I have it."

 _"Yes, I can see you do; very good. Now, set the box on the coffee table and sit down on the sofa."_ When Vin had done as he'd been told, the voice returned. _"Open the box, Vin. I have some presents inside for you."_

Tanner removed the lid from the box. Inside he saw an assortment of sex toys, as well as a couple of black velvet drawstring bags, and a bottle of liquid KY.

_"Take out the metal balls and the KY, Vin."_

His hands shaking slightly, Vin reached into the box and took out a set of seven metal balls that were linked in a line on a thin rubber cord. The first ball was small, no more than a fourth of an inch in diameter, but each one increased in size, and he guessed the largest was a little over an inch in diameter.

 _"Rub some of the KY over them, Vin,"_ the voice instructed and Tanner complied. _"Good boy. Now, I want you to get on your hands and knees on the sofa, your ass pointing toward the sliding glass doors… That's right. Now, slowly insert the balls into your ass, one at a time – all of them."_

Vin felt his cheeks burning again as he assumed the requested position on the cushions, then he reached back, pressing the first of the cold spheres past the tight pucker of his ass so it slipped inside his rectum. His muscles clenched slightly, but three more balls followed in quick succession. The fifth was a little harder, the increasing size making it more uncomfortable than the ones before, but Vin forced it, and then the largest two balls, so only a large metal ring protruded from his ass.

_"Oh, yes, that was lovely, Vin, just lovely. Now, sit back down on the sofa again."_

Vin crawled around and gingerly lowered himself so he was sitting on the cushions. The cold metal ring was pressed tight against the cheek of his ass, and he had to fight the uncomfortable sensation of wanting to bear down and force the balls out.

_"Now, take the KY and spread some of it over your cock… Good… This time I want you to lean back, close your eyes, and imagine that it's Agent Larabee who's touching you, his hands touching you, his hands preparing you, stroking you, pulling on you, making you harder and harder. I want to see you hard, Vin, do you understand me?"_

"I understand," Tanner hissed through clenched teeth as he tried to arouse himself. He had to find a way, he knew that. The Voice would use that whip on Chris, he had no doubt of that. He had to get hard, and quickly.

He closed his eyes and tried to recall one of the many fantasies he'd spun with Chris as the central character. He latched onto one and tried to lose himself in it.

He'd imagined Larabee finding him in the barn, his shirt off, sweat rolling down his skin as he worked. In his flights of fancy, Chris had found him irresistible. Pure fiction, he knew, but he didn't care. He'd imagined Chris coming up behind him, grabbing him, pulling him to him, the blond's lips pressing a crushing kiss to his own lips, Larabee's hands touching his skin… God, how he wished he could really feel that, feel hunger in the man's touch.

Vin let the fantasy play out and, slowly, his cock began to respond, growing longer and thicker in his hand.

_"Yes, that's better, much better… Spread your legs, Vin… Mmm, that's right… Oh, yes, that's what I want to see… You're getting hard now… Touch your tits again, Vin… Yes, like that… And now your balls… Beautiful… Keep going, Vin… I want to see your cock dripping."_

Tanner used one hand to touch his nipples, then his balls, while his other hand continued to glide up and down on his slick shaft, his thoughts focused on some of the images he called on while he jerked off at home, imagining that he was with Chris instead of alone – imagining Chris taking his cock into his mouth, or him, licking Larabee's nipples while his hands stroked the inside of the man's thighs… kissing him, his tongue diving into the man's mouth while Chris arched up, mashing his cock against Vin's abdomen…

Slowly, his cock filled more, finally becoming fully erect. At last, the first drops of precome began to seep from the wine-red tip.

_"Mmm, yes… I know you're wishing he was there to lick those drops off, don't you, Vin?"_

"Yes," Tanner gasped, his voice airy with increasing arousal. The balls in his ass were making him squirm and he longed to reach down and pull them out, but he didn't dare.

As if the voice had read his mind, it told him, _"Now, lift your hips, Vin, then reach down and pull the balls out. Count them off for me."_

Vin let go of his balls, which he had been squeezing, rolling his testes inside his sacs with his fingers, and reached for the ring. He hooked his finger through it and tugged, popping the first one free. "One," he gasped as his muscles responded with a spasm. "Two… three… four… oh, God… five… six… seven…" The last came out almost a whimper, and he was surprised to find his ass suddenly felt empty.

_"You liked that, didn't you, Vin? It felt good, didn't it?"_

"Yes," he whispered, ashamed of his body's reaction.

_"You feel empty inside right now, don't you, poor pet?"_

"Yes," came another shame-filled whisper.

_"Check inside the box, Vin, you'll find a nice butt plug waiting for you in there."_

Vin sat up and leaned forward, dropping the metal balls onto the coffee table and checking inside the box. There was a plug there and he reached in and took it out.

 _"Lube it up,"_ the voice ordered.

Vin rubbed some of the KY over the soft surface.

_"Now, I want you to lie back and lift your legs into the air… Yes, that's right. Now, reach down and insert the plug…"_

Vin reached down, rubbing the tip of the plug up and down his crack until he found his hole. He pressed, forcing the length of the device into his ass, grimacing as the tapered length stretched him open farther than the balls had as it slid in. The widest portion of the plug was probably a good inch and three-quarters wide, but then it narrowed again and his muscles closed over the neck, sealing it inside his body. A T-shaped handle protruded from his ass, just like the metal ring had.

_"Beautiful, Vin, just beautiful. You can lower your legs back to the sofa now… Yes, that's good. Now, reach down and play with yourself some more. I want to see you hard again."_

Vin stretched out along the couch cushions, his hands going back to his cock. He wondered what Chris was doing, if he was watching him as well, or if he was just lying somewhere, tied up and helpless. He hoped Larabee was trying to get free, that he'd be able to overcome the distracted caller while he watched Vin.

He gripped his shaft with one hand, pumping and squeezing it while he used the thumb of his other hand to rub over his sensitive cock head. In a couple of minutes, he was fully hard again.

_"Your cock is absolutely stunning, Vin. I love looking at it. Keep stroking yourself…"_

Vin continued, trying to keep his mind on Chris and how it would feel if the blond was going down on him. He could imagine how hot Larabee's mouth would be, the wetness of it, the feel of his tongue, his lips on his skin…

_"You're close, aren't you, Vin."_

"Yes," Tanner hissed, swallowing hard.

_"What are you thinking about? Tell me."_

"Chris," Tanner replied.

_"Tell me more."_

"Thinkin' 'bout Chris goin' down on me…"

_"Mmm, yes… How does he do it?"_

"Takes me in his mouth," Vin said, his voice raspier than normal. "Tongue licks me… lips slide over me… he sucks on me… teeth slide over me…" Vin could feel the plug more as he pressed down against the cushions, felt his muscles spasm around it as if they were trying to suck it in deeper inside his body.

_"Yes…"_

"Tongue plays on m' glans… tip pokes at m' slit…" Tanner's hands worked faster now, one sliding, the thumb of the other rubbing tight circles over the head of his cock.

_"Would he swallow you, Vin? Take your cock down his throat?"_

"Yes," Vin replied. He'd imagined it so many times. He could see himself with his hands on either side of Chris' face as he pumped his cock down the man's throat… "Oh, God," he gasped softly.

_"That's right, you're fucking his face, aren't you, thrusting your cock down his tight throat… I want you to come, Vin. Come for me… Come for Chris…"_

Vin's hips pressed up and his hand flew, his body tensing and beginning to shake, and then he was coming, pumping out his seed over his hand, creamy ropes of it falling across his lower belly and his groin.

He slumped back on the cushions, his ass aching slightly as his muscles strained and relaxed around the invading object.

 _"Beautiful, just beautiful,"_ the voice said, and Vin could hear the man clapping his hands. _"Now, lift your legs, Vin. Lift them up and pull the plug out."_

Vin forced his legs up, his muscles a little lethargic in the aftermath of his orgasm. And, reaching down, he took hold of the protruding handle and began to pull, but the wideness at the base of the plug made his body jerk and he had to force himself to take a deep breath and relax, then bear down so he could pull the widest portion free. But, once he had, the rest of it slid quickly and easily out.

He let go a sigh of relief.

 _"Oh, pet, we're only getting started,"_ the voice warned him.

Vin lowered his legs, his body quaking with a mix of dread and desire. "Please, let him go now," he said, knowing the plea would fall on deaf ears.

_"No, not yet, Vin. There's more you have to do for me before I'll allow Agent Larabee to go."_

"Just don't hurt him. I'll do whatever y' want, just, please, don't hurt 'im."

_"I know you will, Vin. You're very obedient, my pet. And I know Agent Larabee appreciates that, don't you, Agent? See what you've been missing? Now, Vin, I want you to sit up and look inside the box. There are two black velvet bags; take out the one with the red drawstring. Do you see it?"_

"I see it," Vin replied, his heart beginning to beat faster as he contemplated what might be inside that bag.

_"Take out the bag and open it."_

Vin did as he was instructed. Inside the soft folds of fabric was a leather and rubber bridle gag. He shivered when he saw it. He'd never used anything like it, or been with anyone who had.

_"Slip the rubber bit into your mouth, pet, and secure the leather straps around your head."_

Vin's hands shook as he opened his mouth and inserted the tube of rubber. He bit down on it to keep it from falling out of his mouth, then reached up and fumbled with the two sets of straps, finally getting both secured, his long hair making it more than a little difficult to feed the straps through the buckles.

 _"Mmm,"_ the voice sighed, _"you look wonderful, pet. But I want you to tighten both straps another notch."_

Vin frowned, but he complied, the rubber now pulling almost painfully at the corners of his mouth. Having the object in his mouth made him start to drool slightly and he sucked the saliva to the back of his throat and swallowed it.

_"That's right, very good. Now, inside the box is a leather cock ring. I want you to take it out and keep it close at hand."_

Vin reached in and took the item out.

_"Now, Vin, lube yourself again and lay back, make yourself hard again."_

"I can't—" he tried to say, but the gag made it impossible.

 _"Take your time, we have all day,"_ the voice told him.

Tanner squeezed out more of the KY and lay back, the cock ring lying between the cushion and the back of the sofa as he began to stroke himself again. He took several deep breaths, trying to slow his racing heart. He wasn't sure how much time the voice would give him, and he didn't want the bastard using that whip on Chris.

He closed his eyes, continued to breathe deeply, and reached for another fantasy, but everything seemed to skitter from his thoughts as soon as he seized on it. _Damn it_ , he thought, _get it together, Tanner_.

He could feel himself swelling a little, but he still had a long way to go.

Then he found a fantasy that didn't crumble as soon as he grabbed hold of it. He and Chris, in Larabee's big shower, Larabee's soapy hands gliding over his body, teasing his tits, sliding over his ass and his cock, rubbing over his hole…

_"Mmm, yes, that's right, Vin. Very good… I know you're thinking about Agent Larabee's hands touching you… Touching you in all those intimate places… His fingers, pressing into your body…"_

Vin moaned softly, the caller's words synchronizing with his fantasy-Chris as he imagined him sliding soapy fingers into his ass.

_"Now, Vin, secure the cock ring in place."_

One of Tanner's hands slipped off his hard cock, fumbling for the cock ring and finding it. He opened his eyes, looking down at his erection as he secured the tight ring of leather in place. It was uncomfortably tight.

_"Now, reach into the box and take out the other bag, Vin, and keep touching yourself. If you go soft, Agent Larabee will feel the bite of my whip, and I know you don't want that to happen."_

Vin reached into the box as he continued to fondle his balls, glad the cock ring would help him stay hard, and pulled out the second bag. It was heavy, and he wondered what could be inside even as his fingers were forcing the white drawstring open. His hand disappeared inside, his fingers contacting a smooth, cold surface. He drew out the object.

It was a glass dildo, long and thick, and cut to resemble a real cock, complete with ridges and veins. He swallowed hard. It had to be at least two or two and a half inches in diameter near the base, and a good eight inches long.

 _"Look at it Vin,"_ the voice instructed. _"Beautiful, isn't it?"_

Vin wasn't sure what to say.

_"Rub it over your body, Vin."_

Tanner swallowed hard, then lifted it to his chest and ran the tip along his skin.

_"Lower."_

Vin repeated the move, but pushed it down, rubbing it over his belly.

_"Yes, that's right… Now, lie down on the sofa and rub it along your crack…"_

Vin turned the dildo over in his hand, then lay down facing the back of the couch and pushed the slightly flared, bullet-shaped head into the crack of his ass, rubbing the tip over his hole.

_"That's right… I know you wish that was Agent Larabee… You wish he was there to make love to you… But he's going to, Vin…"_

Vin groaned around the rubber bit.

_"Stop."_

Vin's hand immediately went still, the dildo still touching his hole.

_"Lube it, Vin."_

Tanner turned over and sat up, reaching for the bottle of KY. His heart was beginning to race. It was bigger than anything he'd ever let inside his ass, and he wasn't at all sure he'd be able to take it. He used a generous amount of the slick liquid on the glass surface, making sure it was well-coated.

" _That's good… Now, take the lube and that beautiful cock, lean back on the sofa, and put your feet up on the coffee table."_

Vin took up the position.

_"Open your legs, pet, I want you to use your fingers to lube your ass… We have to get you ready to take that beauty."_

Vin swallowed hard and set the dildo aside. It had a flat base, looking like half a pair of real low-hanging balls. Picking up the KY, he squeezed out some of the liquid onto his fingers, then reached down and rubbed it over his hole. He squeezed more onto his fingers and this time reached down and inserted one of the digits into his ass.

_"That's right, but you'll have to do better than that. Add a second finger, Vin."_

Tanner did as he was told, already beginning to pant.

_"Pour some more KY over the dildo and we'll begin."_

Vin pulled his fingers free and reached for the KY, pouring more over the glass cock. Then he carefully reached down and positioned the point of the head against his hole.

_"Push, Vin, and don't stop until it is completely buried inside of you – right where you wish Agent Larabee's cock was."_

Vin drew a deep breath and tried to relax, praying he could do what the Voice was asking him. He gripped the cool glass cock at the base of its shaft and pressed it against himself.

_"Slowly, Vin, slowly, I want to savor the sight of you as you're penetrated."_

Tanner panted some more, sweat breaking out thickly on his upper lip as the flared head began to sink into his rectum. He bit down on the rubber bit in his mouth and grunted as the glass glans passed the tight ring of muscle, the diameter of the shaft below it slightly smaller.

 _"Don't stop,"_ the voice warned him.

Sweat began rolling down his chest and his face as he slowly forced the thick object deeper and deeper inside himself. He groaned, the penetrating dildo making his muscles spasm. He squeezed his eyes shut and clamped down harder on the bit. It was getting more difficult to keep the cock sliding into him, as his muscles were still too tight.

He gulped in air and huffed it out, willing his body to open and accommodate the glass cock. He groaned as pain began to flare inside him and the progress of the cock slowed.

He heard the sharp crack of the whip and he yelled as best he could, "No!"

 _"Push it in deeper, Vin,"_ the voice ordered, thick with lust. _"Now."_

Tanner's eyes squeezed tightly shut as he pressed harder against his own resisting body, forcing the invading glass cock in deeper. He couldn't stop the cries of pain that escaped his throat as he did, though. If felt like he was being impaled on a two-by-four.

_"All the way in – now, Vin."_

He shifted his hand, grabbing the base of the dildo and cramming it into his ass, his body jerking roughly as he did. A long keen of pain accompanied the move, but the glass cock was finally buried completely inside him. The twin bulges of the textured glass balls that made up part of the base were pressed tightly to his ass cheeks. He held on to the base, the thick glass dick staying right where he'd put it while his body continued to spasm and twitch, his head jerking from side to side, his breath hissing past the rubber gag as he moaned and whimpered.

He wanted it out, _now_ , but he knew he couldn't remove it. It would cost Chris a lash with that damn whip, and he knew a weapon like that could flay flesh off bone if the wielder knew what he was doing.

_"Oh, yes, Vin, that's right. Spectacular. How does it feel, having nine thick inches filling you up, hmm? Do you think Agent Larabee could do any better?"_

"Yes!" Vin screamed past the gag.

The voice laughed. _"Your cock disagrees."_

Vin knew he was still fully erect, the cock ring ensuring that he stayed that way. Beads of fluid leaked from the tip.

_"Now, fuck yourself with it, Vin. Nice and slow… for now."_

Vin's hand was shaking badly as he pulled the glass cock out a couple of inches and slid it back in, then repeated the move, again and again, his body slowly adjusting to the dildo's presence and size.

As he fucked himself, he thought about Chris, imagined that it was Larabee making love to him, Chris sliding in and out of his ass, taking him, loving him…

_"Faster, Vin."_

Tanner picked up the pace, drawing the cock out a little farther before ramming it back home. He could see Chris in his mind, hair golden in the sunlight, beautiful, his full cock driving into him. He chewed on the bit, feeling his body tensing. His balls began to ache, but he couldn't release the load that was building there, not with the cock ring still in place. It felt like he was slowly getting ready to explode.

 _"Faster,"_ the voice hissed.

Vin went faster, finding just the right angle so the glass slid over his pleasure spot. His hips jerked and he worked the cock so he was nearly pulling it all the way out before shoving it all the way back in. But he still couldn't come.

Images flashed through his mind: Chris taking him on his bed… in the kitchen as he braced himself against the countertop, his legs spread wide for the man… out in the barn…

_"Oh, yes, that's right, that's it… Oh, yes…"_

Vin began to keen again, his hips thrusting wildly to meet the motion of his hand. His other hand grasped his balls and pulled on them, trying to ease the tightness and the pain that had begun to center there. He'd wanted Chris so badly, had for so long now…

_"He's fucking you, Vin. He's taking your body, using it, claiming it."_

The keen became louder, more desperate. His hand twitched toward the cock ring. God, he _had_ to come.

 _"Don't touch it,"_ the voice snapped, the pop of the whip reinforcing the command.

Vin cried out, begging for release, but the words were nothing more than inarticulate sounds as they escaped around the bit.

He was going crazy, his entire body threatening to explode. _Please, please, please_ , he chanted silently. _Chris, please… Please, let me come… Please…_

 _"Faster, Vin,"_ the voice panted. _"Harder,"_ it grunted. _"Oh, yes, like that… Oh, yes… He's fucking you, isn't he, Vin?"_

Tanner wailed, his head tossing.

_"Now, Vin, now, take it off!"_

Vin's hand fumbled with the snap on the ring, his other stabbing his ass with the glass dildo. And as soon as the leather ring popped free, his body erupted, thick ropes of come shooting free from his agonized balls, some of it falling across the coffee table, most of it landing on the floor and the sofa and Vin himself.

His fingers milked his dick for all he was worth, while his other hand slammed the cock into his ass and held it there while he continued to thrash. He thought he could hear sounds of the Voice coming as well, the noises an echo of his own.

His orgasm seemed to go on forever, but then came to an abrupt end. He collapsed back against the cushions, gulping for breath, his head pounding. He could feel the muscles in his rectum continue to spasm around the dildo, but he was too weak to reach down and pull it out.

He could hear the pants as the man behind the voice came down from his own orgasm as well.

 _Bastard… Fucking bastard_ , Vin moaned again and again, but the words were nothing more than sounds.

_"You did well, my pet, very well. Why don't you reach up and remove the gag."_

Vin wasn't sure he could manage the buckles, but he did, pulling the device off his face and throwing it away.

_"You did wonderfully."_

"Where's Chris?" Vin gasped.

_"Right here, pet."_

"Let 'im go," Vin groaned.

_"I will, just as soon as you reach down and pull his cock out of your ass."_

Vin let his legs fall open and he reached down, taking hold of the base and carefully pulling the glass dildo out of himself. He dropped it onto the floor, where it landed with a loud, dull _thud_. He could feel the KY leaking from his hole, running down to soak into the sofa cushion.

 _"You are more than I had dared to hope,"_ the voice told him. _"So much more… Until we meet again, pet…"_

"Wait!" Vin cried, lunging for the phone. But the line went dead, the sound of a dial tone filling the room. "Chris!" he cried.

Vin sagged back against the sofa, the balls of his hands pressed hard against his closed eyes. "Bastard!" he raged. "Fucking _bastard!_ I did what you wanted!" His voice caught as the first sob broke free of his chest. "I did what you wanted," he moaned.

Frustration and anger swept over him, and he released it in a scream that exploded the silence in the house. Then he was crying, unable to stop himself, even though he tried desperately.

Some time later, thought returned and he realized he was staring at the phone, willing it to ring, willing the Voice to return and tell him where Chris was. But there was nothing but silence.

He forced himself to move, to sit up, to grab his pants, pulling them into his lap and fumbling for his cell phone. He flipped it open and the first thing that caught his attention was the time.

Four hours?

Had it only been four hours since he'd arrived at the ranch?

He shook his head and forced himself to look down at the number pad. He reached out, intending to press "3" in order to speed-dial Josiah, but he couldn't bring himself to do it.

He pressed "7" instead, for Chris, and waited. Larabee's voicemail picked up.

"Chris?" Vin said, his voice so raspy he barely recognized it. "Jesus, Cowboy, I need to know if you're all right…" He stopped when his voice caught and he closed the phone, ending the call.

Glancing around the empty room, Vin tried to decide what to do next. He knew he should call Josiah, or Buck, and tell them someone had Chris, but then he'd have to explain how he knew… and what had happened.

He looked down, catching sight of the glass dildo on the floor. It was streaked with lube, shit, and blood.

He felt his stomach knot and he bolted off the couch, but he wasn't in time. He heaved, spewing the contents of his stomach onto the carpet. He did it again before he reached the bathroom in the hallway. Dropping to his knees, he clung to the toilet as he his stomach continued to try and turn itself inside out, even when there was nothing left inside it. All the while he could feel the lube oozing down the insides of his legs.

Finally, he pushed back and sagged against the cabinet, waiting for his body to stop shaking before he climbed weakly to his feet. He was going into shock and he knew it.

He shuffled back to the living room, returning to the sofa and the abandoned cell phone. This time he opened it and pressed down on the number three. A few moments later, he heard Josiah say, _"Yeah, Vin, what do you need?"_

"'Siah?" Vin whimpered.

 _"Vin?"_ the older man asked, knowing immediately that something was wrong. _"Vin, what's going on?"_

"I… I need some help."

_"Where are you?"_

"The ranch," he replied, tears beginning to run down his cheeks again. "C'n y' come get me?"

_"I'll be there are fast as I can, son."_

"'Siah…"

_"What is it?"_

"Don't call nobody else; not yet. Promise."

There was hesitation, but the older man said, _"All right, but I can't promise once I get there."_

"Hurry," Vin said, his teeth beginning to chatter. A thick band of black began to squeeze in from his peripheral vision.

 _"Hang on, Vin,"_ Josiah told him. _"Keep talking to me, son."_

"Can't," was the whispered reply as Vin's eyes began to roll back in his head. A moment later, he was passed out on the couch.

_"Vin? Vin! Damn it. I'm coming, Vin. You hear me? I'm on my way!"_


	2. Josiah Arrives

**Saturday**

**1:41 p.m.**

Josiah pulled up and parked directly behind Vin's Jeep. He climbed out of his Suburban, his gaze sweeping over the property as he jogged to the house. He tried the front door and, finding it unlocked, pushed it open, calling, "Vin?" as he entered, his gun in his hand.

He found the younger man passed out on the sofa, the stench of vomit filling the living room. The big profiler glanced around as he holstered his gun, taking in Tanner's naked body, the cell phone clutched in the man's hand, the dirty glass dildo on the floor, the bottle of KY and the box of sex toys on the coffee table. He frowned, not understanding any of what he was seeing. And he knew there would be no finding out, either, not until he could talk to Tanner.

He knelt next to the sofa and called, "Vin, can you hear me? _Vin_."

The sniper moaned softly, his forehead wrinkling as he frowned slightly.

"Vin," Josiah called a little louder. "Come on, son, I need you to wake up and tell me what the hell is going on here. Come on, Vin, wake up."

Blue eyes blinked sluggishly open. "'Siah?"

"Yeah, it's me," he said, reaching out to gently touch Vin's bare shoulder. As soon as the profiler knew Tanner recognized him, he carefully helped him to sit up. "Damn, son, what the hell happened? Chris didn't—?"

Vin shook his head, his cheeks going bright red. "He's got 'im," he said, his voice so thick and so soft the older man wasn't sure if he'd heard him right.

"Who?"

"He's got Chris," Vin said, reaching out to shake his cell phone in front of Josiah's face, then he looked away, staring out the sliding glass doors.

" _Who_ has Chris?"

Tanner shook his head, his expression turning desperate. "I don't know. Fucking bastard!"

Josiah shifted, noticing the spots of KY and come on the sofa cushions. "Vin, did someone…?"

Vin jerked like he'd been slapped, his eyes flashing to Josiah's and then immediately away again. "He's out there, watchin'," he said, fingers tightening and loosening on the cell phone.

"Vin, who—?" Josiah stopped, changing tactics. "Tell me what happened, son."

Tanner swallowed hard, unsure if he could do it. He stared down at the phone, expecting it to ring, but it didn't.

"If someone has Chris, we need to get a search started," Josiah said soothingly. "I need you to tell me what's happened so I can figure out what to do next, okay?"

Vin's body immediately began to shake and his eyes rounded. The panic was so obvious, Josiah knew what was coming next. He grabbed the small wastepaper basket that was under the end table and shoved it under Vin's chin just as the man heaved. But all he brought up was a small amount of bile.

Vin grabbed hold of the can, though, hugging it tightly to his bare chest as his stomach continued to spasm and clench. But through it all, he never released his hold on his cell phone, Josiah noted as he sat down next to him, frowning. He slid his own cell phone from its case on his belt and called Nathan.

_"Hello?"_

"Nathan, I need you to come out to the ranch – right now."

_"Josiah? What's going on?"_

"Just get out here as soon as you can, brother. And bring your kit."

 _"On my way,"_ the man replied.

Josiah closed his phone and returned it to the case as Vin sagged back against the couch. He reached out and took the trash can away, setting it aside. "Vin…"

The sniper looked like death warmed over, and the only thing that seemed to hold his attention was the cell phone and whatever he was looking at beyond the glass of the sliding doors. Josiah put his worry on hold and pushed to his feet, heading to the linen closet in the hallway and pulling out a spare blanket. He took it back to the living room and wrapped it around Vin's naked shoulders.

"Vin, I'm going to go make some coffee," he told the trembling man. "You just stay right here, okay?"

Vin nodded, his slightly glazed eyes once more returning to the scene beyond the glass doors, and Josiah couldn't help but wonder what it was he was seeing out there.

He hurried to the kitchen, making fresh coffee and pulling the pot out so he could fill a cup as soon as it began to brew. When the cup was full, he added four heaping teaspoons of sugar to it, stirred it and took it back to Vin, who hadn't moved an inch as far as the big man could tell.

Tanner jumped slightly when Josiah held the cup out to him, but he took it and began to sip on the hot, sweet liquid.

"Vin, can you tell me what happened here?" Josiah asked.

Tanner stared into the cup, took a couple of deep breaths, and slowly told the older man what had happened, starting with his arrival at the ranch and ending with the caller hanging up on him without telling him anything about where to find Chris. Tanner's voice remained flat and emotionless throughout the description, as if he was recounting something that had happened to a total stranger, or on TV.

When Vin finished, Josiah let out a long, shaky breath and tried not to look at the glass cock on the floor. There probably wasn't much chance of the forensics guys lifting any useable prints from the items Vin had been forced to use on himself, but there was a chance they might be able to get something off the box, or from the unused items left inside. And Nathan was definitely going to need to check and make sure Vin hadn't done any harm to himself with the dildo. He shook his head, feeling his own anger rise. That someone would do that to another—

He stopped the thought. He was all too aware of what human beings could do to one another to climb onto _that_ mental soap box. What he needed to do right now was to help Vin through this, and find Chris.

Looking at the younger man, he marveled at the loyalty and friendship it must have taken to prompt Vin to do those thing to himself, to spare Chris possible injury. Or worse, he realized. Still, for two men who hadn't known each other all that long, it seemed, well, downright amazing.

Disproportional, too, he knew. His head cocked slightly to the side as his gaze swept over Vin. Disproportional, unless Vin had deeper feelings for Chris than he'd suspected. That wasn't possible, though, was it?

Granted, he hadn't heard about Tanner dating anyone, hadn't seen him hitting on anyone at the office, or when they'd gone out. Hell, maybe he _did_ have feelings for Chris. It was something he would need to ask Vin about, but not right now. Right now, Vin didn't look like he could handle much of anything, and Josiah knew it was going to be hard for the younger man to allow Nathan to examine him, but it had to be done.

"Vin, I want you to stay put and drink that coffee, okay?" Josiah asked.

Tanner nodded, sill staring out the sliding glass doors like he expected to see Chris walking up to join them at any moment. And maybe he did, Josiah decided.

The profiler stood and went out to his Suburban. He pulled out several evidence bags, then a pair of latex gloves from the box he kept in the gym bag he carried in the vehicle. Returning to the living room, he pulled on the gloves and carefully picked up the dildo, the cock ring, and then the gag, putting them each into bags and placing them back in the box. The two velvet bags and the bottle of KY followed. Then Josiah put the lid back on the box and carried it over to the table in the entryway and left it there.

The older man returned to the living room and stopped, studying Vin. Tanner was still shaking on and off, but some of his color had returned. Knowing what he needed to do next, he returned to the sofa and said, "Vin, I want you to go lay down for a few minutes, okay?"

Tanner looked up at him, blue eyes so lost and confused that the big man had to fight the urge to reach down and gather him into his arms like he might a frightened child.

"I'll help you to the guest room, okay?" he asked.

Vin nodded and handed Josiah his empty coffee cup, then pushed to his feet, the blanket held snugly around him by one hand, the cell phone still clutched in his other hand.

After wrapping his arm around the younger man's shoulders, Josiah guided Vin down the hallway to Larabee's guest room. Opening the door, he waited for Vin to go in first, then walked over and pulled down the blanket and the sheet on the bed, waiting until Vin came over and climbed in.

"I'll be back to check on you in a few minutes," Josiah said, making sure he moved the small wastepaper basket over next to the bed, just in case Vin needed it. "Will you be all right?"

Vin was curled up on his side, staring at the phone in his hand. He nodded.

Josiah wasn't sure he should leave Vin alone, but he knew he couldn't leave the house the way it was, either. "If you need anything, just give me a holler, okay?"

Vin nodded, but his attention remained on the silent phone.

Josiah sighed softly and left the room. The next stop was the kitchen for some cleaning supplies. He tackled the vomit on the carpet in the living room first, then the semen and KY on the rug and sofa cushions. As he worked, he took the opportunity to call Buck.

_"Wilmington."_

"Buck, it's Josiah," the man said, going on to tell him some of what had happened. "Can you call JD and Ezra and get over to the office? See what you can do about starting to look for Chris."

 _"We'll start by seeing if we can find out about where that call came from,"_ Buck agreed.

"That's what I was thinking, too. I called Nathan. When he finishes looking Vin over, I'll have him drop off the box of… evidence off at the lab."

_"All right. You call me if that boy needs anything, all right?"_

"You know I will."

 _"Jesus,"_ the ladies' man said. _"What exactly—?"_

"I'll fill you in on the details later."

 _"Yeah, okay,"_ Buck agreed, not sure he really wanted to hear any of the details. _"I'll call you if we find out anything."_

Josiah returned his cell phone to its case, and had just finished putting up the cleaning supplies, the cloths he'd used already washing in the washing machine, when he heard Nathan arrive.

"Vin, Nathan's here," he called as he passed the guest room. There was no response, but then, he hadn't really expected one.

Going to the front door and stepping outside, he caught Nathan before he came in, giving him a quick rundown on what had taken place.

"Jesus," the former medic breathed, looking as if he might be sick himself. "You let the others know about Chris?"

Josiah nodded. "Called Buck," he said. "He and the others are going to see what they can find out about where the call was placed from."

Nathan nodded. "Vin?"

Josiah sighed softly. "I think he's still mostly numb. He was a little shocky. I got a cup of coffee into him," he said, leading the way inside, "and so far it's stayed put, so his color's better, but he's still, well, you'll see. Just go easy with him."

"I will," Jackson promised.

The two men entered the guest room to find Vin sitting up in the bed, his back pressed against the headboard. His shoulders were wrapped in the blanket Josiah had given him earlier, and his cell phone was clutched tightly in one hand.

"Hey, Vin," Nathan greeted, moving slowly to the bed and sitting down. He set his kit on the floor and reached out, taking Vin's wrist and getting his pulse. When he was done, he leaned over and opened the kit, pulling out a BP cuff and a stethoscope. "I'm gonna get your vitals, okay?"

Vin nodded, his head hanging down, unable to meet Jackson's eyes.

Nathan went slowly, taking the man's blood pressure, checking his respiration, and then coaxing him to lie down so he could examine him, making sure nothing he'd done to himself had caused any serious physical harm. He talked softly to Vin throughout the ordeal, reassuring the man, telling him exactly what he was doing, what he was finding, and what it meant, but Vin didn't really seem to be listening to him. In fact, it was as if the spirit that usually animated the man had fled and all that was left was an empty husk.

When he was done, Nathan covered Vin up again and gently patted his shoulder. "You're going to be just fine," he assured the man. "Now, I want you to see if you can get a little sleep, okay?"

Vin nodded and closed his eyes, listening as the two men left the room, one of them pulling the door closed behind them. He waited until he heard their footfalls fade, then sat up again and looked down at his cell phone.

"Call, damn you," Vin hissed at it. "Call…"

But the phone remained silent.

He waited for a time, then sighed and lay down again, his fingers curling more tightly around the phone. Then, closing his eyes, he fell into a troubled, exhausted sleep.


	3. The Investigation Begins

**3:17 p.m.**

In the kitchen, Nathan leaned back against the counter and sighed heavily. "Well, I think he's going to be okay – physically, anyway. He's a little torn up, but I don't think it's anything too serious. Thank God he was using lube."

Josiah nodded. "I figured. Can you take the, uh, stuff this bastard left for him and drop it off at the forensics lab?"

Nathan nodded. "You gonna stay here with him?"

"Yeah, I think I'd better."

That got another nod from the former medic. "Probably a good idea. I don't think he ought to be left alone until we find Chris."

It was Josiah's turn to nod.

Both men froze when Larabee's phone rang. On the second ring, Josiah picked it up, saying, "Larabee residence."

 _"Hey, Josiah,"_ Buck greeted him, _"just wanted to give you an update."_

"Good news, I hope," the profiler said.

 _"I wish,"_ was the ladies' man's reply. _"They traced the call to Chris' place. It came from a disposable cell phone. The techs are tracking down the method of payment, see if that can help us any, but I wouldn't hold my breath if I was you."_

"Nathan's going to bring the evidence in for the techs to check for prints and trace."

_"Well, hopefully they'll have more luck turning up a lead than we have. How's Vin? Is he hurt?"_

"Think it might be best if Nathan fills you in on the details when he gets there," Josiah replied.

_"Yeah, okay. You're gonna stay with Vin, right?"_

"Yep."

There was a pause, then Buck added, _"He might be better off in the hospital, if it's bad enough he's not coming in to help."_

"You'll understand when Nathan explains," Josiah promised him.

_"All right. Well, we'll keep trying to come up with something. Chris' Ram there?"_

"I didn't see it, so, no, I don't think so," Josiah said.

_"I'll get info on the truck to DPD, see if they can find it."_

"And you'd better get some officers out here to do a sweep around the house. This bastard got inside to leave a box behind, and he had to be close enough he could see Vin through the windows."

 _"Whoever this was, he was able to see into the house, see what Vin was doing?"_ Buck asked.

"Every detail. Given what he had the boy doing, I'd be willing to bet there might be some fluid evidence out there somewhere," Josiah added.

 _"I'm on it as soon as I hang up,"_ Buck assured him.

"Call me if you hear anything."

_"You do the same."_

The two men ended their calls and Josiah walked Nathan out to his car, carrying the red gift box, which he set on the back seat.

"He needs anything, you call me, or get him to Summit," Jackson said.

"I will."

"Probably going to have some bad dreams for a while…"

"Then I'd better get back."

Nathan nodded and started the car. "You be careful."

"I will be. You and the others do the same. This might not be about Chris, or Vin."

Nathan nodded and pulled away.

Josiah turned and headed back into the house, locking the door behind himself. He stood, trying to settle on what to do next, then decided he would see what he could pull together for a light dinner in a couple of hours.


	4. The Dream I

Vin was imprisoned, trapped inside a glass box, naked, frightened, and beyond the glass he could see Chris. The blond was tied to a pole, his arms stretched above his head, drawing his body taut. He was naked as well, and ugly red welts covered his body. Bright red whip marks crisscrossed his back, each of them seeping enough blood that the man's back and ass were coated by the bright red substance.

Vin watched as the blood began running down the backs of the man's legs. He beat his fists against the glass wall, trying to shatter it, trying to reach Chris, but the barrier was too thick, too strong. He screamed his frustration, but there was no sound.

Then the Voice filled the box, swirling around him like it was a living thing, creeping into his skull so he could feel it as well as hear it.

_"Hello, pet…"_

"Let him go," Vin begged, his hands pressed tightly against the cool glass. The blood had reached the backs of Larabee's knees.

_"I can't do that. Not until you give me what I want."_

Vin felt tears beginning to sting his eyes, but he ground his teeth together and opened his legs.

 _"Yes, that's it,"_ the Voice said. It was half hiss and half sigh, and it felt like it was wrapping itself around his legs, like thin, flat snakes. _"Now, pet, bend over."_

Vin squeezed his eyes shut when Chris glanced back at him over his shoulder. He couldn't stand the look in the blond's eyes.

_"Now, pet, or I'll lash him again."_

Vin swallowed the bile rising up the back of his throat and leaned forward, turning his head and pressing his cheek against the glass. He felt the Voice swirl quickly around his torso and over his shoulders, before dropping down his back and flowing over his ass.

 _"So beautiful,"_ it whispered to him.

He felt it slip between his ass cheeks and whimpered softly, unable to contain the sound. Then it was penetrating him, flowing into him like a ribbon of cold liquid, filling him up inside and plunging deeper and deeper into his guts.

"Stop… please," he choked, but it continued pouring into him. Then, a small stream broke off from the rest, swirling between his legs, wrapping itself around his balls and cock. It forced him to full hardness in an instant.

He groaned lowly, his cheek sliding down the glass, his eyes squeezed tightly shut, tears making the glass wet. The Voice was flowing over all of his body, trapping him in place, holding him perfectly still as it continued to fill his ass, pull on his cock, squeeze his balls…

It was consuming him.

He began to keen softly, trying to fight, trying to move, even a little, but he was unable to even twitch a single muscle. The Voice had complete control of his body, and it was taking him, using him, possessing him in a way he had hoped only Larabee would ever manage.

But Chris didn't want him, _couldn't_ want him. Not now, not after this.

He felt the fluid ripple flowing into his ass change into a hard shard of glass. He was impaled upon it. "No!" he cried, the thickness of it too much for him to stand. It was splitting him in half, cleaving him open.

His cock began to explode, his body spewing out blood instead of semen, like an artery had been cut somewhere deep inside of him. The stream struck the glass wall, splattering across it, the blood running down the surface, a viscous ooze of bright red, just like what painted Larabee's back and ass and legs.

The shard, buried deep inside him, was growing thicker, ripping him open, tearing his body in two.

"No!" he cried again. "Stop! Stop!"

But the Voice only purred as it crystallized on the surface of his body, holding him together even as he was being torn apart from the inside out.

He screamed again, the pain and humiliation overwhelming. "No! Stop! Please… _Please_ …"


	5. First Clues

**5:37 p.m.**

Josiah heard the soft keen and looked up from the notes he had just finished writing. He had wanted to capture on paper as much of what Vin had told him as he could, knowing it might make writing his statement a little easier for the man. And he also wanted to double-check the account with the sniper, in case Tanner had forgotten something the first time through.

"No!" Vin cried weakly. "Stop! Stop!"

"Vin?" he called, hoping to pull the man from the nightmare he was obviously trapped in.

"No! Stop! Please… _Please_ …"

"Vin!" Josiah called again, a little sharper this time.

Tanner sat up with a gasp, his eyes going wide and his hands coming up to claw at something that wasn't there.

Josiah saw the look, too, and he bolted from his chair – positioned close enough to the bed so he would hear a nightmare like this one. But he couldn't reach the small trash can in time. Vin retched, and what was left of the coffee he'd drunk earlier filled his mouth, spilling over his chin to land on the blanket that covered him.

When Vin stopped heaving, Josiah helped him from the bed, guiding him first to the bathroom, to rinse out his mouth and wipe off his face, and then to Chris' room.

Through it all, the sniper kept his cell phone clutched tightly in one hand, and the profiler just didn't have the heart to try and take it away from him. He helped his friend into Larabee's bed, and settled him back against a pair of pillows.

"You want to tell me about it?" he asked, knowing full well Vin would refuse.

"He had me," the sniper mumbled quietly, surprising the older man. "In a glass box. I could see Chris; he was all bloody. He… He… I was bein' torn up, but I couldn't move. His voice was like some kind 'a livin' thing… a monster."

Josiah sat down on the edge of the bed and reached out, lightly resting his hand on the sniper's arm. "Vin, what you're feeling right now, it's normal, you do know that, right?"

Tanner chuffed out a laugh.

"Vin, listen to me," Josiah said seriously, "what you went through, it's trauma, physical and emotional trauma."

"Y' heard anythin' from the others?" Vin asked, abruptly changing the subject.

Josiah sighed softly, knowing he couldn't force the man right now. "Buck called about twenty minutes ago. DPD found the Ram in Denver. It was a couple of blocks from the federal building, so whoever took Chris wanted it to be found. They didn't find any prints on it – the guy was wearing surgical gloves, they think. They're still looking for any trace evidence."

Vin nodded, staring down at the cell phone still clutched in his hand.

"Feel like eating something?" Josiah asked.

Vin shook his head.

"You need to keep your strength up."

"Couldn't keep it down," Tanner sighed quietly. He lifted his chin, meeting Josiah's eyes. "We should be out there, lookin' fer Chris."

"You have any idea where we should start?" Josiah asked seriously. He had to consider that Vin might be better off if he _was_ out there, working.

Tanner thought for a moment, then shook his head again. His chin dropped back to his chest, his gaze returning to the cell phone.

"Vin, I've written down everything I can remember from what you told me earlier. Think you could look it over and see if I missed anything? Maybe you'll remember something—"

"If I remembered anythin', I'd tell ya," Tanner snapped angrily, but he didn't look up.

"Vin—"

"Ah, hell, 'Siah," the sniper breathed, his shoulders sagging, "didn't mean t' bite yer head off." He looked up now, the resignation he was feeling all too clear in his eyes. "Give me what y' got."

Josiah nodded, knowing Vin was only doing it because it might help Chris. He'd done everything to try and protect Chris. And then it came to him, the realization swift and jarring, but the profiler knew it was the truth. He rose and returned to the guest room to get the notepad, retuning to the master bedroom to leave it with Vin while he went back to clean up the mess on the bed in the other room.

Once he had the bed remade, he returned to the master bedroom, finding Vin right where he'd left him, the notepad now lying in his lap.

Josiah sat down on the edge of the bed and asked, "Anything else come to mind?"

Vin pressed back against the headboard and closed his eyes. "Think maybe he knows me, J'siah."

"Why do you say that?"

"Said m' body was what he'd expected, like he'd seen me before, but now he was finally seein' me without m' clothes on," Vin said quietly. "Called me by name, too, but he only called Chris 'Agent Larabee.'"

Josiah frowned slightly. "All right, what can you tell me about his voice?"

Vin smiled briefly, but there was no humor in it. "Sounded like Ezra, but no accent."

"So he used annoying, big words and—"

"No," Vin interrupted, shaking his head, "wasn't the words he used, it was the _way_ he talked – smooth. Y' know, like he enjoys hearin' himself talk."

Josiah nodded. He could imagine a voice like that. "But you're sure you didn't recognize it?"

"No, I didn't recognize it. Thought 'bout that the whole damn time. Just don't remember hearin' it before, but, like I said, he sounded like he knows me."

"Maybe he's been watching you," Josiah said. "Have you noticed anyone new at any of the places you visit on a regular basis?"

Vin drew in a deep breath and let it out in a long sigh as he thought about that possibility, then he shook his head. "Ain't like I got 'places,'" he said. "I go t' work, I go t' the gym, the range, St. Philips, 'n' m' apartment… the Saloon, too, 'n' out here. Hell, that's 'bout it."

Josiah nodded. His life was limited to an almost-identical list. "What about the Rec Center there in Purgatory, anyone new there, or in your apartment building?"

"Same folks as there always is."

Josiah sighed. He hadn't noticed anyone new at work, or at the Saloon. There were two new trainers at the gym they all used, but they were both women. "Nobody new out at the range?"

"Same guys I've been seein' since I started usin' it."

"Grocery store? Gas station?"

"Hell, J'siah, I don't know. I don't think so."

"Any repairmen in your apartment recently?"

Vin scowled. "Only the guys who come t' fix the elevator. Neither of 'em sounds like this bastard."

Josiah sighed, his mind trying to come up with other possibilities. "Mechanics? The Jeep was in the shop last month, right?"

Vin shook his head. "Jose and his brother and nephew are the only ones at the shop."

"Maybe it's someone who saw you somewhere at random, and he's been shadowing you."

"Maybe," Vin said, but he didn't sound convinced. "Think I'd've noticed a stalker."

Josiah had to agree. Vin was a trained observer, and it was unlikely someone could have been following the man around for any length of time without him noticing it.

"But he knew things, J'siah… 'bout this place."

"Which he might have checked when he left the box for you. He probably opened all the curtains, too."

"Yeah, but how'd he know I was even gonna be here? I didn't tell anybody."

Josiah frowned.

"'Less Chris told 'im," Vin added.

The profiler nodded. "Then it might be someone Chris knows. But probably not well if he's calling Chris 'Agent Larabee.' Unless he did was to deliberately throw us off. Chris say anything to you about someone getting into his space?"

Vin shook his head.

Josiah looked at Tanner, wishing there was something he could do or say to help the man, but until they had a solid lead on Chris' whereabouts, he was afraid there was very little anyone would be able to do.

"Was thinkin'," Vin said quietly, "maybe y' ought t' go on home."

"Vin, I can't leave you out here alone."

"He told me not t' call nobody. Chris could be payin' fer this. If y' go, maybe he'll call me again, tell me where Chris is."

"Vin, you know I can't do that."

Vin looked up at the older man, his expression pleading. "It's gotta be why he ain't called. He'll hurt him, 'Siah, I know he will."

"Vin, I _can't_ leave you out here alone."

"Please—"

The sound of Larabee's phone ringing ended their conversation.

The two men exchanged looks, then Josiah hurried from the room, Vin a few steps behind him, still undressed.

Josiah picked up the receiver in the kitchen. "Larabee residence," he said as casually as he could manage.

 _"Hey, Josiah, it's me,"_ Buck replied.

"It's Buck," the profiler said to Vin, who was standing in the doorway, looking pale and a little shaky on his feet. "Go back to bed. I'll come tell you what they have."

Vin wanted to argue, but he was already beginning to shiver and his legs felt rubbery. He nodded and padded away.

Josiah turned his attention back to the caller. "You do have something, I hope."

 _"Not much,"_ was the reply. _"How's Vin doing?"_

"Still shaky, but he's coming around a little."

 _"Look, Vin called me this morning, asked about Chris, since he wasn't there. I told him I figured Chris had stopped over at that new bread place to pick up something for them for breakfast, so I went by there, and the manager said Chris_ did _stop in this morning – to pick up those bagels Vin likes. He paid cash and left."_

"Then our voyeur might have gotten Chris in the parking lot."

"That's what I was thinking, too. Me and JD are going to hang out there tomorrow morning, see if we can talk to any of the regulars who come by in the mornings."

"Saturday crowd might not be the same people as on Sunday, or during the week," Josiah told him.

 _"Yeah, I know, but there's not a whole lot else we have to work with. Haven't heard anything on the box, or the stuff in it,"_ he said, then paused before adding, _"Christ, Josiah, what that bastard had him do…"_

"Yeah, I know."

_"Hell, I can't imagine doing that for anybody, you know?"_

"I know," Josiah replied, but he could imagine doing it for one person – the person he loved.

_"He must… I mean, he had to— He must—"_

"And if he does?"

There was a brief silence and then Buck said, _"Hell, I don't care if he's— well, you know."_

"Gay?"

 _"In love with Chris,"_ Buck clarified. _"Already figured he was gay, or maybe bi, like Ez."_

That bit of news surprised Josiah, as did Buck's easy acceptance of alternative sexualities, but he didn't say anything. "You hear back from the sweep around the ranch?"

 _"Yep,"_ Buck replied. _"They found fresh tire tracks out in the west pasture. I figure somebody out there with a good set of binoculars could see right into the house if the curtains were all opened. They took some stuff back to trace, but I haven't heard anything, yet. Travis is on 'em, so they'll be making this their top priority."_

"You called him?"

_"Had to."_

"I figured."

_"Nathan took him in and talked to him in Chris' office. Guess he gave Travis more details than he did the rest of us. Never seen the old man look like that before."_

"Yeah, I'll bet."

_"Anyway, Travis lit a fire under a bunch 'a asses, so we're gettin' all the help we need, but there just isn't anything solid to move on yet."_

"Vin thinks I should leave him alone here, see if the guy calls him back."

 _"Don't do it,"_ Buck said, sounding genuinely alarmed. _"DPD has officers all around the house. No way in hell someone's going to get close enough to see in there again. That boy's gonna need a friend close by, so you stick to him like gum on a shoe, y' hear?"_

"I plan to."

_"Hell, if he's sayin' things like that, you'd better go make sure he hasn't bolted."_

The thought hadn't occurred to Josiah before Buck said it, and he made a soft yelping sound.

 _"Go on,"_ Buck told him, _"I'll call you if I hear anything."_

"Thanks," Josiah replied. "Bye."

He hung up the phone and hurried back to the master bedroom. But Vin was sitting on the edge of the bed, dressed in a pair of Larabee's gray sweatpants and a black ATF T-shirt. The relief that swept through the older man upon seeing Tanner sitting there was enough to make his knees shake for a moment.

"They find anything?" Tanner asked.

Josiah nodded. "Looks like our voyeur might have gotten Chris when he stopped by that new Panera they built out here."

Vin's jaw tightened. "He went t' get me some of those bagels. He knows how much I like 'em."

"They found tire tracks out in the west pasture, too," Josiah continued, hoping to divert Vin from the guilt trip it sounded like he was taking. "Some trace evidence there, too, I guess, but nothing's come back from the lab yet."

"Buck call Travis?"

"He did," Josiah said, knowing he had to be honest with Vin, even if he wished he could protect the younger man. "Nathan filled him in on the details."

Vin just nodded, looking away to the window. The light was fading, and it seemed to him to reflect his future with Team Seven, which he could see slipping away over some faraway horizon that was out of his reach.

"Look," Josiah said, "I'm going to go put some soup on, okay? You really do need to eat something."

Vin just nodded again, but he continued to stare out the window. Somehow, he wasn't sure how, he knew the bastard was still out there, still watching. At least, it felt like he was. But he wasn't going to call while Josiah was here with him.

"Reckon I could eat some soup," Vin replied.

"Okay, I'll go fix that," the older man replied. "I'll come get you when it's ready, unless you want to come and keep me company?"

Vin shook his head. "Think I'm gonna grab a shower."

"All right," Josiah replied, watching as Tanner stood and headed into the master bath. A few moments later, he heard the water come on and he blew out a breath and headed for the kitchen to get that soup on the stove.


	6. The Call Comes

Vin stepped under the stream of hot water and closed his eyes, but as soon as he did, he saw the Chris from his dream. His eyes popped open and he scrubbed himself, wishing the dirty feeling clinging to him would come off as easily as the sour sweat that had coated his body.

When he was as clean as he could get, he turned the water off, then stepped out and dried off. He put the same clothes back on, then went back to the bedroom to find a pair of socks to borrow. His own clothes were probably still in the living room, but he wasn't ready to go back down there to find them.

After pulling on a pair of thick athletic socks, he reached over and grabbed his cell phone. As he did, he felt it vibrate.

He jerked, dropping it onto the bed. His heart began to race as he reached out and picked it up, flipping it open and lifting it to his ear. "Chris?" he called in a half-strangled whisper.

 _"No, Vin, it's me,"_ the Voice replied.

"Where's Chris?" Vin demanded, keeping his voice low. He could feel the rage inside him swelling up to engulf the fear he'd been feeling.

_"Agent Larabee is still with me."_

"I did what y' wanted," Vin hissed into the phone. "Let 'im go."

 _"Soon, Vin,"_ the Voice replied, _"but first you have to do a little more for me."_

"I've done all I'm gonna do," Tanner growled. Then he heard it: the crack of the whip, and a resulting scream of pain. "No!" he gasped. "Stop, _please_. Don't hurt 'im no more."

_" I tell you what you'll do, Vin. You need to remember that, or Agent Larabee is going to pay the price for your disobedience. Have I made that clear enough for you?"_

"Then tell me, damn it," Vin moaned.

_"In the early morning, while Agent Sanchez is still asleep, I want you to leave that house and go back to your apartment building. You'll sit in your Jeep, in the parking lot, until I call you. Is that clear?"_

"I hear ya, just don't hurt 'im again," Vin said, needing some kind of reassurance.

_"As long as you obey me, pet, Agent Larabee will be unharmed. Be sure you're there by daybreak, understand?"_

"I understand," Vin replied.

_"Good, Vin, that's very good. Until morning, then. Sleep well, pet."_

The connection was lost and Vin cursed softly under his breath. He closed the phone and stood, jerking as he turned to go just as Josiah opened the door and stepped into the room.

"Soup's ready," the older man said. Then, noting the paleness of Vin's face, he asked, "Are you all right?" as he walked over to stand next to the man.

"Yeah," Vin lied, "just wishin' Chris would call, y' know?"

"Yeah, I know," Josiah said, slipping his arm around Vin's shoulders. "Come on, you haven't eaten all day, some food will help."

Tanner nodded, knowing now that he had to eat. He had to be ready for whatever tomorrow morning might hold.


	7. Escape

**Sunday, 3:57 a.m.**

Vin walked silently down the hallway. He paused at the open door to Chris' guest room, listening to the sound of soft snores coming from the man sleeping in there. When he was sure Josiah was sleeping deeply enough, he slipped inside the room and went to the chair where the man's clothes lay folded and waiting. Slipping his hand into the man's pant pockets, he found the keys he needed.

He laid the pants back down on the chair and silently left the room, going to the front door, keying in the security code and slipping out into the darkness. He pulled the front door shut behind himself, making sure it was locked, then headed for Josiah's Suburban, which was parked directly behind his Jeep. He had his own keys, too, so the older man would be stranded at the ranch until someone came to get him, and he was hoping that would give him the time he needed to find out what the Voice wanted from him next.

Whatever it took, he was going to get Chris back – safely.

He opened the driver's side door and climbed into the Suburban, adjusting the seat and the side and rearview mirrors before inserting the key and starting the big vehicle. He left the headlights off while he backed up, keeping an eye on the front door to make sure Josiah hadn't discovered his departure. When he could, he pulled the Suburban around and turned, heading slowly down the driveway to minimize the noise.

Then, turning onto the road that would take him to the highway, he sped up, thinking he had to hurry if he was going to reach his apartment before dawn.

As he drove, he ran though everything again, trying to remember something that would tell him who the Voice was, but there was nothing. He just didn't know who it could be.

The traffic remained light, and the drive passed faster than it would have later in the morning. Before he really realized it, Vin was pulling into his parking lot. He looked up at the darkened windows of his own apartment, and wished he could go up and crawl into his own bed. He was tired – exhausted, really – but he knew there would be no rest for him, not until Chris was back.

He reached into the pocket of the borrowed sweats he wore and pulled out his cell phone, holding it as he waited for the next call to come.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

  **7:31 a.m.**

As light filtered into the guest room, Josiah rolled over onto his back and stretched. Sitting up, he scrubbed his hand over his face and then got up to go check on Vin, hoping the man had managed to get some restful sleep.

He knocked softly on the closed bedroom door, and when he didn't hear a reply, gripped the knob and turned, pushing the door open and calling softly, "Vin?"

When he saw the empty bed, he felt his stomach drop.

"Damn it, Vin," he hissed, turning and heading straight to the front door. The security system was unarmed. He unlocked and opened the door, seeing that his Suburban was gone.

"Shit," he swore, turning and heading to the phone in the living room. Picking it up, he called Buck.

 _"Hey, Josiah,"_ the ladies' man greeted.

"Vin's gone," the profiler said.

 _"Well, goddamn,"_ was the immediate reply. _"How—?"_

"He must have left sometime last night, or maybe this morning. He took the Suburban."

_"You need a ride?"_

"Yeah, but I'll call Nathan; he's closest. Would you take JD and go over to check Vin's apartment?"

_"Sure, but why do you think he'd be there?"_

"Just a guess, but if this guy isn't finished with him, he needs someplace he can force Vin to… perform. Someplace that's private enough Vin won't be discovered, or interrupted."

_"All right, we'll head out as soon as we're done."_

"Anything new?" Josiah asked.

 _"Not sure,"_ Buck replied. _"Ezra had an idea, though. He went in and followed the trails from Chris' and Vin's credit cards and bank accounts – to see where they'd been, and what they've been doing over the past three months."_

"And?" Josiah asked.

_"Junior was right, he has no life, but Chris has been working on that back pasture so he's been making trips to Home Depot every couple of weeks, and I know Vin went with him a couple of times to help him load and unload lumber. And Chris also had that new phone line put in out there, for the computer modem—"_

"Right, and that was over a weekend, so Vin could've been out here when that was done, too. Oh, and didn't Chris say something about somebody coming out here to look at the roof, too?"

_"Yep, that's right. Remember Chris sayin' how Vin almost got hit in the head when the inspector's tape measure fell out of his pocket?"_

"I do. And the Ram was in the shop for a couple of days, too. Vin was with him when he dropped it off _and_ when he picked it up."

_"I'll pass that on. Anyway, Ezra's following the money trail, seeing who might have, and I quote, 'observed our tempting teammates together.' He thinks he might get a buzz off the guy if he runs across our twisted Peeping Tom."_

"Tell Ezra it's a damn good idea. I'll keep my fingers crossed."

 _"Will do,"_ Buck replied. _"All right, then, we'd better get a move on."_

"Thanks, Buck."

_"I want this bastard, Josiah. Bad."_

"Me, too, brother, me, too."

After he ended the call with Wilmington, Josiah phoned Nathan, explaining what had happened and concluding with, "So, it looks like I need a lift."

 _"On my way,"_ was Nathan's immediate response.


	8. Giving Chris Back

The sky was just beginning to turn gray when Vin felt the cell phone vibrate in his hand. He flipped it open and put it to his ear, saying, "I'm here, just like y' told me."

 _"Yes, I can see that,"_ the voice replied. _"Very good, pet. Very good, indeed."_

"Where's Chris?" Vin asked.

_"All in good time, Vin. Right now, I want you to get out of that Suburban so I can see you better."_

Vin didn't hesitate. He opened the door and climbed out, closing the door and locking the vehicle.

_"Mmm, you are delicious. I like those sweatpants. Tell me, are you wearing anything under them?"_

Vin swallowed hard. "No," he replied.

_"Mmm, very good. Were you looking forward to my call?"_

"'Bout as much as another hole in the head," was the honest reply. The resulting laughter surprised Vin, but he didn't comment.

_"Well, I've been looking forward to seeing you again, Vin. I can't get enough of that beautiful body of yours. I've been watching what you did for me yesterday, and I have to say it is… inspiring. I hope you like what I have for you now."_

"Let's just get this over with," Vin said, his voice emotionless.

_"Very well, but remember, if you don't do exactly as I say, I'll use my toys on Agent Larabee. Understand?"_

"I understand."

_"Good. I want you to go straight up to the roof of your building. Don't stop at your apartment. You have exactly one minute."_

Vin felt his body moving even before he could consciously will himself to start for the apartment building. He knew he had to follow the Voice's direction; Chris' life hung in the balance.

He sprinted to the main doors, pulling them open and heading inside. It was early enough that no one was up and around just yet. He bypassed the elevator, heading straight to the stairs and starting up, taking the steps three at a time. When he reached the door leading to the roof, he stopped, panting slightly as he gripped the knob and turned. Usually it was locked, but this time it turned and opened.

Vin stepped out onto the roof and lifted the cell phone to his ear.

 _"Close the door and lock it,"_ the voice told him, and Vin complied. _"Good. Now, right there next to the door, you'll see an iron bar. Slide that into the brackets I've provided."_

Tanner reached out and took the short piece of rebar. He set it into the two reinforced metal brackets that had been mounted to the wall and the door. No one was getting out onto the roof unless they took the door off its hinges, and that wouldn't be easy, not given the old coats of paint that covered them.

_"Walk over to the elevator shack, Vin."_

Vin crossed to the small shack that housed the mechanical brains of the old, dilapidated system. The structure was about twelve feet wide on all four sides and sat at an angle to a large storage shed the building super had erected on the roof to hold his paints, tools and other supplies. The effect was a wedge-shaped space that was closed at the narrow point of the V, and protected from prying eyes on two sides. But the space opened up at the wide end, allowing a clear line of sight in that direction. But there were no taller buildings in that direction, no way for someone to see him.

That's when he noticed the small camera that had been mounted to the eaves of the shed. And, directly across the space from the camera, there was an object covered by a piece of heavy black plastic.

Vin realized that there must be at least one other camera on the roof – one that overlooked the door leading out onto the roof so the Voice could see he had secured the door properly. But a quick glance around didn't reveal any more than the one looking down on him now.

 _"Go unwrap my present, pet,"_ the Voice commanded.

Vin took a deep breath and walked up to the plastic-draped object, then reached out and pulled the plastic off. Under it, he found what looked like a horse vault that gymnasts used. But this one had been modified with padded shelves that had been added along both sides, and, toward one end of the vault, a large, flesh-colored rubber dildo had been secured to the top. It rose at an angle, like an accusing finger pointing right at Vin.

On the opposite end from the dildo, leather saddlebags hung from either side of the vaults.

 _"Time to undress, pet,"_ the Voice instructed.

Vin set the cell phone down on the vault and removed his T-shirt, shoes, socks and sweatpants. It was cool, but he didn't notice, his building anger making it easy to ignore the cold air.

When he picked up the phone again, the Voice continued, telling him, _"Now, if you open the saddlebags, you'll find a few other items waiting for you."_

Still holding the phone to his ear, Vin opened the flap on the bag closest to himself. Inside, he found another bit gag. His stomach clenched at the sight of it, but he swallowed back the bile that rose up the back of his throat and pulled it out. Under it was a full tube of KY.

Laying both items on the top of the vault, he stepped around and opened the flap on the second bag. In that one, he found another cock ring, but this one had clips attached to it via a thin, silver chain. There was also a pair of leather wrist cuffs, one that secured with a metal buckle, the other with a Velcro strip.

_"Shall we begin, pet?"_

"I got t' know Chris is all right," Vin said thickly.

There was a pause, and then Larabee's voice called, _"Vin? Vin, don't—"_

_"Satisfied?"_

"Don't hurt him."

 _"Do as you're told and he's yours when you're done,"_ the Voice promised.

Vin felt a leap of hope at the words, but he knew he couldn't trust the Voice. "Swear it."

_"Don't push me, pet."_

Vin ground his teeth, but he didn't say anything more.

_"Now put the gag on, Vin. There's a rubber loop added to the upper strap so you can slip the cell phone into it. Make sure you can hear me clearly."_

Tanner reached out and picked up the rubber and leather device. He felt his stomach knot again, but he ignored it, placing the rubber bit in his mouth and biting down, then fastening one leather strap behind his head, the second across the crown of his head. He made sure it was as tight as the last time from the beginning, wanting to get the ordeal over with as quickly as possible.

When it was secured, he used his fingers to locate the rubber loop and slipped the upper portion of the cell phone into it. In place, it pressed tightly to his ear.

"Say somethin'," Vin articulated around the rubber bit.

_"You are a treasure, Vin."_

"C'n hear y'," he managed.

 _"Excellent,"_ the voice told him. _"Now, I want you to lube the dildo."_

Reaching for the lube of KY, Vin saw his hand was shaking, but he ignored it, grabbing the tube and twisting off the cap. He squeezed out a large amount of the gel into his palm, then reached over and wrapped his fingers around the large dildo, rubbing the KY over the smooth surface. The dildo was slightly soft and felt very much like a real erect penis would feel under his touch. It was at least as large as the glass dildo he'd been forced to use before.

When the rubber cock was liberally coated with KY, the voice said, _"Now, take some more and work it into your ass. We have to get you ready for the ride of your life."_

Once again Vin's stomach knotted, and he sucked in several deep breaths through his nose as he squeezed out more of the lube onto his fingers. Reaching around, he rubbed it over his hole, then used his finger to force some of it inside himself.

_"Squat down, pet, you're going to need to get three fingers in there before you mount for me."_

Vin swallowed again, silently praying he didn't throw up, then dropped into a squat and began to pay attention to what he was doing. He worked two fingers into himself, then pulled them out, added more KY and tried for three, but he was too tense.

 _"Too soon, pet, too soon,"_ the Voice purred into his ear. _"You have to go slowly, let your mind create a seduction. Think about Agent Larabee. Think about how much you want him to touch you like this…"_

Vin closed his eyes and sucked in several more deep breaths, trying to resurrect a fantasy to use, but there was nothing. All he could see was the Chris from his dream – a bloody, accusing Chris, who looked at him with disgust. Gritting his teeth, he forced his fingers into his ass, bearing down to try to force himself to open up. He worked his fingers in and out, grunting softly.

_"Enough; let's get you where I can see you better, shall we?"_

Vin pulled his fingers free and stood.

_"Climb onto the vault."_

Vin walked over and climbed on, straddling the vault, his shins resting comfortably on the padded shelves. He looked down at the wrist cuffs and the cock ring, knowing what was coming next.

_"All right, pet, close your eyes, and touch yourself. I want to see you hard again. I need to see that…"_

Vin sighed softly, but he closed his eyes and reached down to touch himself. His slicked fingers moved easily over his flaccid shaft, but there was no stir of arousal.

_"Ah, pet, you have to do better than that."_

"'M tryin'," Vin said around the bit. Squeezing and pulling, using everything he knew about his own body, he tried to arouse himself.

 _"Quickly, Vin, or I'll be forced to do this—"_ There was a sharp crack and Tanner heard Chris howl with pain. _"—again."_

"'M tryin'!" Vin yelped again as he heard Chris cursing the Voice, but he was pretty sure his own words were unintelligible.

_"I know you don't want me to hurt Agent Larabee…"_

"No!"

_"…but I want you to know this will be the price of your failure."_

The sharp crack sounded again in his ear and Vin jerked as if he'd been struck himself. Chris shouted, then snarled something Vin couldn't make out. Tanner moaned, his hands working faster, trying to bring life to his cock.

There was another crack, and another cry of pain.

Vin's squeezed his eyes shut and he bit down on the rubber bit in his mouth. He tried to force everything from his mind, but he was all too aware of the rain of blows that was continuing. Then those disappeared as well, fading into the distance in his consciousness as he lost himself in a vision of Chris lying on his bed, his legs open, waiting for him.

He wasted no time, mentally climbing onto the bed between the man's legs, his head dipping to lick up the inside of the blond's thigh. He nuzzled the man's filling cock, his balls. He drank in the intimate scent of the man, letting it act like an aphrodisiac. He lifted his chin, licked across the weeping head of Larabee's cock and felt the man's member jerk under the touch. He suckled it into his mouth, rolling it over his tongue, sucking gently on the head, his lips locked just behind the glans.

Larabee moaned softly and began to rock his hips, trying to slip more of his growing erection into Vin's mouth, but Vin held it, trapped, his tongue playing over the spongy head, teasing at the slit.

He could feel Chris swelling, reacting to his touch, his tongue… He finally released the head, letting more of the thickening cock slide into his mouth, laving it with his tongue. The blond's hips bucked harder and pressed up higher, seeking entry into the depths of Vin's mouth.

And he drank it down, lost himself in the worship of it.

_"That's right, Vin, that's what I want to see. So beautiful. It's time to put your cock ring on, pet."_

Vin reached out, fumbled for the ring, found it, then opened his eyes so he could see to put it on. His cock was hard, the first drops of precome clinging to his slit. He slipped the ring around his shaft and snapped it into place, ensuring that his erection would not be lost.

 _"Now, attach the clips to your nipples,"_ the Voice told him.

Vin reached down and lifted the clips. They tinkled on the silver chain. He opened the first and let it close on his right nipple. The strong pinch was enough to prompt a yelp from him.

_"Now the other one."_

Vin opened the second clip and let it squeeze close on his left nipple, moaning this time as the bite of pain shot through the sensitive nub.

_"Very good. Now it's time we got you into those cuffs. First the right hand. Use the buckle."_

Knowing he had no choice, Vin slipped his right wrist into the cuff and cinched the buckle down tight. He could see that there was enough give between them so that he could slip his left hand into the second cuff and then use his right to secure the Velcro strap. They weren't meant to really secure him, just give the illusion that he was secured.

_"Oh, very nicely done, pet. It's time for you to take that ride. Lift your ass and back up, you're going to have to take this from the back, but you should be able to force that cock up your sweet ass. At least, you'd better be able to. I'm trading my crop for my dragon's tail, Vin, and you already know what I'll do with it if you fail me."_

Vin nodded, knowing if he tried to speak, he'd throw up. He opened his hands, pressing them down on the top of the vault, his fingers splayed to give him more balance, then lifted his ass into the air and scooted back until he felt the dildo nudge his ass cheek.

He couldn't reach back, so he had to shift his hips back and forth until the tip of the flesh-colored head nudged against his hole. Lowering his hips, he felt the dildo slide up the crack of his ass. He pulled forward.

The dildo was rigid, more so than he'd expected, given how it felt to his touch, but then it would have to be, if he was going to impale himself on the damn thing without being able to reach back and hold on to it. He positioned himself again and pressed back. This time, the angle was right and he felt the wide, flared head of the cock beginning to sink into his ass. He went slowly, knowing he risked doing himself harm if he forced the massive dildo into his body without care, but he wanted this to be over as quickly as possible.

Still, his body wouldn't allow him to hurry, his muscles refusing to surrender to the invader. He was forced to lean forward a little and then press back, rocking himself slowly onto the dildo until his muscles finally yielded. As he sank lower on the massive cock, he moaned quietly. It felt like it was splitting him open, just like in his dream.

By the time he was finally sitting on the vault, the whole dildo buried in his ass, there were tears running down his cheeks, but he didn't even notice them.

_"Oh, yes, pet, that was magnificent. Stay there, allow yourself to adjust. It fills you up, doesn't it, every inch of it, possessing your body… There's nothing but you and the cock. It controls you, commands you. It defines you. Now, Vin, I want you to ride. Ride that cock. I want to see it disappearing into your body, again and again."_

Vin whimpered, but he rose off the vault, pulling himself off the cock inch by inch. He stopped when just the widely flared head remained inside his ass, then lowered himself onto it again. He repeated the action, his ass rising and falling on the thick dildo over and over again.

 _"Faster,"_ the Voice urged.

As before, once the initial pain subsided and he found the right angle, Vin was able to use the dildo to stimulate his gland, sending pulses of pleasure shooting through his groin and making his balls pull up. After a short while, his cock began to ache and his fingers itched to reach and unsnap the cock ring, but he knew what that would cost Chris, so he continued to ride the massive cock, his thrusts down onto it picking up speed and intensity.

_"Yes, that's right, pet. Fuck it… Fuck it… Yes…"_

Vin keened, his balls feeling like they were about to explode. He threw his head back, arched his back and pressed down with his hands as hard as he could while his hips jerked wildly. He wanted to touch himself. He wanted to yank off the cock ring. He wanted to come. He wanted this nightmare to end, but he couldn't have any of those things.

_"Down, all the way down on it, pet."_

Vin thrust his hips down, driving the dildo deep into his guts and grinding himself against the base.

_"Release the ring."_

Vin humped against the base of the cock, feeling the shaft moving over his pleasure spot as he fumbled with the snap. Then it popped open and he grabbed his cock with one hand, pulling on it twice before he was coming, milky ropes of semen shooting onto the top of the vault and over the flaps of the saddlebags.

The forestalled orgasm seemed to go on forever, the muscles in his ass going wild around the invading cock.

He could hear the Voice coming as well. _"Yes! Shit! Oh, fuck… Fuck…"_ it barked out.

When it finally ended, Vin sagged, the dildo still buried inside him, his muscles unable to manage more than a few weak spasms. Sweat ran down his body, dripping onto the vault. He sucked in air around the bit, praying once more that he wouldn't throw up, afraid he might strangle on it with the bit in his mouth.

_"Oh, pet, you are amazing, truly."_

"Chris," Vin managed to moan around the obstruction.

_"Yes, pet, I'll give him back to you. You've certainly earned him. Pity. I would have liked to have kept you longer. There are so many things I can see you doing."_

"Chris," he cried again.

_"You are by far the best I've ever watched, Vin. I'll never forget you, pet – never."_

"Where Chris?" Tanner managed to get out understandably.

" _Your precious Agent Larabee is waiting for you in your apartment. Good-bye, pet. I hope we can meet again one day."_

The call ended.

Vin sucked in a sharp breath. His apartment? Chris had been in his apartment all this time?

Scrabbling with the Velcro, Vin managed to free his left hand, then fumbled with the buckle for several seconds before he got it open. The cuffs were hurled aside. The mouth bit came off next, then he reached down and yanked the clips off his numb nipples and threw them, and the cock ring, away.

Pressing his hands to the come-coated surface of the vault, Vin pressed down and slowly, carefully, lifted his hips, pulling himself off the dildo. It burned as it moved inside of him, but he didn't care. He only knew he needed to get to his apartment.

The flared head caught, and he cried out as he felt it tear flesh as he jerked himself free. He scooted slightly away from the dildo, then leaned forward and lifted his right leg up and over the vault. From that position, he was close enough to smell his own come and it immediately caused his stomach to flip.

He vomited, but bile was the only thing in his stomach to come up.

Sliding off the device, his knees gave way and he dropped to the roof, landing hard on his ass. He cried out, rolling over and up onto his hands and knees, his stomach contracting again.

When the heaving ended, he saw his clothes and crawled over to them, pulling on the T-shirt before making it to his feet to pull on the sweatpants, and then his shoes. He left the socks where they were.

Stumbling around the elevator shack, he made his way to the door leading into the building. Pulling the rebar from the brackets, he threw it aside, unlocked the door, and yanked it open.

The trip down the stairs to the fourth floor almost ended in disaster, but he managed to catch himself in time, saving himself a tumble down at least two flights of steps.

When he reached the door to his apartment, he stopped. His keys were in the Suburban. Eyes squeezing shut, he pressed his forehead against the door and grabbed the knob. "Chris…" he whimpered, savagely twisting as if he intended to rip it off.

The door was unlocked.

Startled, Vin jerked up straight and stared at the knob. He pushed the door open and stumbled into his apartment. Glancing around, he saw no one.

He closed the door behind himself and staggered forward through the living room, past the kitchen and the bathroom to his bedroom at the end of the hall. His breath caught in his throat and he had to force it out with a grunt as he stumbled forward into the room.

Chris lay on his bed, naked, his body covered with red stripes and welts, but there was no blood. Next to the man was what the Voice had called his "dragon's tail." Larabee was bound with duct tape at his wrists and ankles, more of the sticky substance wound around his eyes as well.

There was semen coating the blond's face and chest. The Voice's, Vin knew.

"Chris?" he called, his trembling voice no more than a harsh whisper. He forced himself closer to the bed, finally dropping to his knees beside it. He could see the man's chest was rising and falling, but he seemed to be unconscious.

Reaching out, Vin pressed his fingers to the pulse point on Chris' neck, finding the man's heart beating strongly.

Vin's eyes fell shut as the relief washed over him.

Then, opening them again, he reached out and cupped the man's face in his palm and called, "Chris?"

There was still no reaction from the blond.

"Chris, c'n y' hear me?"

Larabee remained still.

"Damn it," Tanner hissed, forcing himself to his feet. Maybe Chris was hurt. He took hold of the man's shoulder and hip, rolling him carefully onto his side so he could get a look at his back. It was also covered with stripes and welts, and two cuts left behind by the whip, he knew. But they weren't bleeding anymore.

He lowered Chris onto his back again, then grasped the man's shoulders and gave him a gentle shake, calling, "Chris? Come on, Cowboy, y' gotta wake up. Please."

Vin started when he heard his front door burst open, his body jerking violently. He released Chris and turned, dropping automatically into a defensive crouch, determined to protect Chris any way he had to.

Buck and JD rushed into the room. Both men had their guns out, ready to be used.

"Oh, my God," JD gasped, catching sight of Larabee's bound and battered body.

"Vin?" Buck questioned, his attention focused on the younger man, who was a deathly shade of grey. He dropped his gun and lunged forward when he saw Vin's eyes start to roll back and his knees begin to buckle. He caught Tanner just before he hit the floor. "Call 911," he snapped at JD.


	9. Identity Revealed

**11:13 a.m.**

Four members of Team Seven sat in a comfortable waiting room at Summit Medical and Trauma Center. No one had spoken a word after Buck described what he and JD had found in Tanner's apartment, and they had yet to hear from the forensics technicians who had been called to process the scene.

Currently, JD sat alone in one corner of the room, staring out a window at the mountains in the near distance. Buck was stretched out on one of the three sofas, trying to read a book he'd found on a small bookshelf in a corner of the room.

Josiah had taken up a vigil in a comfortable chair, silently praying for the two men who were being treated. Nathan sat on one of the other sofas, watching the television, which had been muted by someone earlier.

When Buck's cell phone rang, all eyes turned to the ladies' man.

Wilmington flipped open his phone and said, "Yeah, talk to me." He listened for a moment and then nodded as he said, "Okay, we'll be here… No, not yet… Yeah, I will." And with that, he closed the phone and slipped it back into his pocket.

"Ezra?" Josiah asked the ladies' man.

Buck nodded. "He thinks he knows who it was." That brought everyone's attention immediately to focus on Wilmington. "He didn't tell me, just wanted to let us know that he's on his way. Said he'd give us what he's come up with then, but he sounded pretty convinced."

Josiah nodded. JD and Nathan turned back to their distractions, and the waiting began again, lasting until the fifth member of the team walked into the room to join them.

Buck and Josiah both came to their feet.

"Who was it?" Buck asked the undercover man.

Ezra stopped, his gaze sweeping over the others. "I take it there's been no word?"

Josiah shook his head.

Standish sighed, walking over to the chair Josiah had vacated and sitting down. The others all shifted to sit on the sofa closest to Standish.

Ezra waited until they were settled, then pulled his notebook from his pocket, flipped it open, and said, "Glen Allen, AKA George Atwood, AKA Gordon Anderson… Mr. Allen was an employee at the Home Depot in Golden. He was also one of that company's consultants for roof repairs."

"So, he could've seen them at the store, and—"

Ezra cut Buck off, saying, "He was the one sent out to Mr. Larabee's ranch to do the estimate on repairs to the roof."

"The guy who almost beaned Vin with the tape measure?" JD asked.

Ezra nodded.

"And where is Mr. Allen-Atwood-Anderson now?" Buck inquired, blue eyes going hard with anger.

"No one seems to know," Ezra reported. "He gave notice three days after he was out at Mr. Larabee's ranch, and no one at the store has seen him since he picked up his personal belongings a little over two weeks ago. He also gave his landlord notice that he would be leaving after his visit out at the ranch, then sold his car and furniture, liquidated his bank accounts, and vacated his apartment two weeks ago. The landlord told me he assumed Mr. Allen had been transferred to a store in another city."

Josiah nodded. "He'd decided what he was going to do, and he knew he'd have to leave town as soon as it was over. He was getting ready to travel."

"Yes, well, he apparently travels light," Ezra replied. "He donated what had to be most of his clothing to a thrift store not far from his apartment building, along with his dishes, books, and other bric-a-brac. Mr. Simmons, the landlord, said all Mr. Allen had with him when he was picked up by a cab was two suitcases and one large steamer trunk."

"Damn," Buck breathed.

"You find out where that cab took him?" Nathan asked.

"The cab company is tracking down that information as we speak," the undercover man said, "but I doubt it was to the airport."

Josiah nodded. "Probably to a hotel, one with a kitchenette, so he wouldn't have to go out much. He'd want to take his time, make sure everything was perfect."

Buck shot the profiler a look and shook his head. "This guy gives me the willies."

"He should," Josiah replied, his tone deadly serious.

"You think he's gone now?" JD asked the profiler.

Josiah nodded. "He got what he wanted from Vin – for now. But if he's fixated on Vin, he'll be back… eventually. He literally won't be able to stay away."

"What do we do?" Nathan asked.

"We keep looking for him," Buck replied.

"How?" JD asked. "Sounds like he changes his name on regular basis."

"How did you find those names, anyway?" Nathan asked the undercover man.

Ezra smiled thinly. "Same social security number," he replied. "They were all perfectly legal name changes."

"So this guy is really Gordon Anderson?" JD asked.

Ezra huffed out a soft sigh and then said, "No, Gene Albert Vine, actually, born May first, 1968, in Seymour, Indiana. A week after he turned fifteen, he was caught peering into a neighbor's bedroom window, not, he claimed, for the first time.

"It seems the man who lived in the house, one Jacob North, was having regular sex with his stepdaughter – his thirteen-year-old stepdaughter. From what I was able to glean from newspaper accounts of the arrest, trial and conviction, Mr. North had his stepdaughter perform sex acts with various kinds of kitchen utensils while he watched her and masturbated."

"Goddamn sick bastard," Buck breathed, shaking his head. The disgusted expression on the man's face mirrored the expressions of the others.

"Indeed," Ezra agreed. "Almost two years later, young Mr. Vine was caught in the commission of what were described as 'lewd and unnatural acts' with another teenaged boy. He was sentenced to a youth detention facility until he turned eighteen. Three weeks after his release, he had his name legally changed to Gordon Anderson and moved to Chicago."

"Let me guess," Josiah said, "he was arrested in Chicago for peeping?"

"Correct," Ezra stated. "Then, in 1988, he was caught peeping on a couple who were into the S-and-M scene. They didn't press charges – seemed rather delighted that they'd had an audience, actually – so he was released."

"Do we know if he had any other contact with that couple?" Josiah asked.

"Not that I know of, and since he left Chicago after the incident, I rather doubt it."

The profiler nodded thoughtfully.

"He moved to Newark for a year, then on to New York City, where he lived in a residential hotel until August of 1993. In 1990, he was picked up during a raid on an adult video store that apparently had private viewing booths in the back. Since he wasn't with a prostitute at the time of the raid, he was released.

"However, I had a friend of mine do a little digging, and he found a police report filed in May of 1993 by a man who claimed that he had been abducted while returning to his car after a night of heavy clubbing. He said the man who grabbed him forced him to commit sexual acts with a shoehorn and a brush handle. The policeman who took the report noted on it that the victim was a known homosexual prostitute and a drug addict. There was, therefore, no follow-up."

"And three months later, in August, Gordon Anderson left the city," Nathan guessed.

Ezra nodded. "You're catching on. He moved to Atlanta, where he changed his name to Glen Allen. He went to work for the Home Depot in Buckhead and was transferred to the store here in Golden in 1995."

Josiah reached up and thoughtfully rubbed his chin. "I'll bet, if you go looking, there'll be another incident in or around 1995."

"Why then?" JD asked the profiler.

"He seems to have a pattern… watching in 1983, doing in 1985; watching again in 1988, probably doing again in 1990. Then he combines both in 1993, and again now, in 1998. There's probably another incident we're missing in 1995."

"And he saw that man with his stepdaughter in May of '83," Nathan said. "In '88, he's peeping again, and in '98, he— well, you see what I mean?"

"He's reliving that event, in his own unique way," Josiah said, nodding. "Every ten years, but that just frustrates him. His frustration builds, and he acts out on it a couple of years later."

"So, if he sticks to his pattern," JD said, "Glen Allen just moved away from Denver, and when he gets to some other city, he's going to change his name and start this all over again?"

Josiah nodded.

"But this time, we'll have the bastard," Buck said.

"If he doesn't change his social security number, does it all nice and legal," Nathan added.

Josiah nodded. "He's learning, getting smarter, more sophisticated – even the objects he's having his victims use are evolving. We can't assume he'll stick to an identical pattern."

Before they could discuss the point any further, a doctor stepped into the waiting room, asking, "Are you waiting for Chris Larabee and Vin Tanner?"

"We are," Nathan replied, all of the men coming to their feet.

The older woman nodded. "Why don't we all have a seat and I'll tell you what I can," she said.

The agents each found places on the sofa, watching as the woman took the chair.

She smiled reassuringly at them, and said, "My name's Elaine Thomason, and I've been treating both of your friends."

"How are they?" Buck asked, guessing that the woman had to be at least as old as Nettie Wells.

"Mr. Tanner is doing well. His injuries have been treated and as soon as the IV he's on is empty, he can go home, but I'd recommend that someone stay with him for at least the next twenty-four hours."

"Don't worry, we're not going to let that boy out of our sight," Buck assured her.

"And Chris?" Nathan asked her.

"Mr. Larabee is still unconscious." She glanced at the men and added, "He was given a relatively high dosage of chloral hydrate, which has left him in a comatose state. His respiration and blood pressure are both depressed, so he's being monitored closely."

"An overdose can cause irregular breathing and cardiac arrhythmia, right?" Nathan asked her, trying to remember everything he could about the drug.

She nodded. "Is Mr. Larabee on any anticoagulant drugs?"

"No," Nathan answered.

"How about any antihistamines, hay fever medications; muscle relaxants or sedatives?"

"No," Nathan answered again.

"Ulcer drugs?"

"I think so," Buck said. "Uh, you can check with Dr. Chandler. He's Chris and Vin's primary care doc."

She nodded again. "Thank you, I'll do that."

"Was Chris…?" Buck started, but then trailed off, blushing. He had no idea how to ask if the man had been sexually assaulted, but thankfully the doctor picked up on his concern.

"Mr. Larabee was not sexually assaulted. He did sustain widespread welts and contusions from flagellation, and two whip cuts, which we have closed and are watching for infection. He was dehydrated as well, but, given how he looked when he came in, he was in remarkably good condition."

"When can we see them?" Josiah asked her.

"You can go in to see Mr. Larabee now. The other agents have finished collecting their evidence. Mr. Tanner is talking to one of our trauma specialists. If you come back to the nurses' station here, they can tell you when he's finished and give you his room number." And with that, the woman stood, shook Buck's and Josiah's hands, then left.

The men waited until she was gone before Buck said, "I want to see Chris."

Josiah nodded, then looked at JD and Ezra, saying, "If it's all right with you, I'll stay here so I can see Vin when he'd finished. I'll just hang around until they release him."

The two men nodded.

"I believe we can be of the most help back at the office," Ezra stated, reaching out to rest his hand on JD's shoulder as he spoke. "I'll see if I can find out where our Mr. Allen has gone, and Mr. Dunne can follow up with the forensics unit, see what they were able to find in Vin's apartment."

JD nodded his agreement, not looking too comfortable about being there to begin with.

Buck shot the younger man a look. "You okay?"

JD nodded and offered a shrug. "Sure," he replied.

Nathan sighed and said, "Guess I ought to go back, too. Can't do much more than sit and worry here." He looked at Buck, then at Josiah. "But you call us when you hear anything, understand?"

Buck held up his hand, saying, "You have my word, Nate."

Nathan nodded and turned to Josiah. "What are you going to do with Vin once he's released?"

The older man thought for a moment, then said, "I think I'll take him to my place. I doubt he's going to feel up to being at his, or Chris', right now."

The former medic nodded. "Probably the best…" he said, but trailed off as his forehead wrinkled with confusion.

"What?" Buck asked.

Nathan turned, sweeping them all with a gaze. "Allen must have gotten to Vin again at his place, right?"

Buck nodded.

"Where?" Nathan asked. "In the apartment?"

The ladies' man thought for a moment, then shook his head. "There was nothing there like you described before."

"It must have happened someplace else in the building," Josiah offered.

"Think I'll stop by there first," Nathan said, "see if I can find where, then get the techs to process it."

Buck nodded and said, "I'm gonna get in there and see how Chris is doing."

"Call us," JD added again.

"Will do."

Ezra made a point of catching Josiah's eye and said, "Tell Mr. Tanner that we are all in his corner. We'll find this son of a bitch, he can be assured of that."

Josiah smiled thinly. "Damn straight, we will."


	10. A Profiler's Thoughts

**3:13 p.m.**

Josiah checked his watch again. It had been almost three hours since they had talked to Dr. Thomason, and Vin was still in with the trauma counselor. That fact surprised him. Even in the short time he'd known the younger man, he'd come to a few conclusions about Vin Tanner. One, the younger man was a very private person, so having to open up like he already had, and probably was again with the counselor, would be nothing short of agony for him. Two, despite making it into the ranks of the ATF, Vin's background was a troubled one, and Josiah suspected that abuse – physical, emotional, and perhaps sexual – played a part in it. That meant Vin was probably dealing with more than just this particular situation, this trauma bringing up past traumas. And, third, even though Vin managed to hide his feelings and his past behind a poker face that rivaled even Ezra's, his eyes sometimes gave away more than he thought they did. The profiler just hoped the counselor was able to get enough out of Vin – through his words and those expressive blue eyes – to offer the younger man some help and comfort.

None of this was Vin's fault, but he knew – without a doubt – Tanner would be blaming himself for the whole thing. At least Chris hadn't been seriously hurt – physically, in any case. God knew what his psychological state might be. But, except for the drugs he'd been given, he was better off physically than Vin was.

But none of that was going to matter to Vin, he knew. The fact that Chris was hurt at all would weigh heavily on Tanner's shoulders. And the reason was already so clear to the older man: because Vin loved Chris, and he wanted to protect him. Perfectly natural, perfectly normal, until someone realized those oh-so human feelings were held by a man for another man.

Josiah shook his head. He just hadn't read Vin as gay, or even bisexual. Looking back now, though, he knew it had been an oversight on his part – cultural blindness. The clues were there, he just hadn't put them together because he'd assumed Tanner was straight, like the rest of them. Well, with the possible exception of Ezra, if what Buck had said was right.

However, he would be willing to bet his next paycheck Chris was straight. So what did that mean for Vin?

Trouble, he decided, and maybe loneliness and heartache, too.

It just didn't seem fair to him. Someone like Vin, who loved someone as much as he obviously did Chris, who had gone to the lengths Vin had gone to protect him… well, he deserved more than a simple, albeit heartfelt, thank-you. He deserved to be loved back just as deeply as he loved. But how that might ever happen, Josiah had no clue.

He hated doomed love stories, always had.

And then there was the matter of Gene Albert Vine, or whatever he planned to call himself next. Josiah had a hard time accepting the man had let Vin off the hook as easily as it appeared he had. Not that what Tanner had been through wasn't horrific, but Vin could have faced much, _much_ worse.

It was on this depressing note that Josiah looked up to see a forty-something woman leaving Vin's treatment room. She was short and petite, her salt-and-pepper hair cut short in a flattering style. But it was her well-defined arms that made it obvious she took very good care of herself. She smiled as she met his worried gaze, the laugh lines around her eyes immediately setting him at ease.

"Josiah Sanchez, I presume?"

That wrung a thin smile from the profiler and he nodded. "And Vin?" he asked.

"Doing as well as can be expected," she replied. "He told me he figured you'd be the one here to take him home."

"I am," he admitted.

"May I ask _where_ you plan to take him?"

"My place," Josiah told her.

She nodded and then fished into a back pocket of her jeans and pulled out a business card. "If he needs me, feel free to give me a call – anytime."

"I appreciate it," he said, glancing down at the card. Dr. Damiane La Melisande – French name, American accent – was an M.D. and a Ph.D.

 _Intelligent and beautiful_ , he concluded, more intrigued than he knew he ought to be, given the circumstances.

"He's probably going be a little shaky for a day or so," she cautioned him, adding, "He said you're a profiler?"

Josiah nodded again.

"Well, then, I'm guessing you already know the signs to watch out for?"

"I do," he told her. "Can you tell me how he is physically?"

Dr. La Melisande cocked her head to the side and said, "I'm afraid I can't get into any of the specifics, but I will say that there are no serious physical injuries, and he should be completely healed up in a couple of weeks."

"I appreciate that, Doctor," he told her, enjoying the slightly conspiratorial look they shared.

"Please, call me Dee, everyone else does."

He grinned. "I'll do that, as long as you call me Josiah."

She smiled and nodded. "The IV is finished, so as soon as he's dressed and I get some paperwork for him to sign, he's free to go."

A nurse walked up just as the doctor finished, handing her a clipboard with papers neatly secured.

"Now _that's_ what I call service," Josiah said.

Dee chuckled. "Well, they do say miracles still happen, guess we just witnessed one."

"Amen to that," was the profiler's reply.

"Let's go spring our lamb, shall we?" she asked him.

"Please. I don't think Vin's ever cared much for hospitals."

"Given his past, I can't say that I blame him," she replied, leading the way into the room.

Josiah followed her, wondering just what, exactly, Vin had told her, and if he and the others would ever hear the stories she already had. Somehow, he doubted it.


	11. Lost Boy

Inside the small room, Vin was sitting on the treatment table, dressed in a pair of scrub pants and the T-shirt and athletic shoes he'd been wearing when Buck found him. He looked up when the doctor and Josiah entered, his eyes rounding slightly with what the profiler thought might be panic. But he quickly regained his composure and asked, "Can I get out of here now?"

"As soon as you sign these," Dr. La Melisande replied, handing him the clipboard and a pen. She pointed out where he needed to sign, and Vin scrawled his name each time, in an obvious hurry to escape the hospital.

The doctor flipped to the back of the papers attached to the board and pulled off a sheet that had three prescriptions printed out on it. She handed it to Vin, saying, "Be sure to pick these up on your way out; the pharmacy should have them ready for you already. Start all three medications this evening, and be sure to follow the instructions on the labels."

"I will," Vin told her, sliding carefully off the table. He was moving stiffly, and Josiah had no trouble guessing the reason. "Thanks, Doc," the sniper added as he passed her.

"You're very welcome, Vin. You have my number, use it if you need to."

Tanner nodded, but he didn't say anything, heading straight for the door and escaping into the hallway.

Josiah flashed her an apologetic smile.

"Take good care of him," she told the profiler.

"I will," he promised, then stepped out to find Vin already standing at the elevators, waiting for him. He walked over to join the younger man and they rode up to the second floor to pick up the medications that had been prescribed. With those in hand, Vin led the way to the parking lot. He stopped on the sidewalk just outside the doors of the hospital and frowned.

"What?" Josiah asked him.

"Uh, your Suburban…"

Josiah smiled. "They brought it here. Come on," he said, reaching out and resting his hand lightly on Tanner's shoulder, "let's get out of here."

Vin just nodded. The fact that he didn't move away from Josiah's touch worried the older man a little, but he could imagine Vin might be feeling the need for a little physical reassurance, so he left his hand on the man's shoulder as they walked over to the big SUV.

It wasn't until they were almost to his house that Josiah realized Vin hadn't asked about Chris. Glancing over at the sniper, he said, "I'm surprised you didn't want to stop by and see Chris before we left the hospital."

Vin turned his head, staring out the passenger side window as he said, "Doc said he was going to be fine. He, uh, he gave him something that knocked 'im out, but they figured it'd be gone by tomorrow."

"We'll go see him tomorrow."

"Yeah," Vin replied, but it didn't sound enthusiastic in the slightest.

Josiah let it drop, but he glanced frequently at the man as he continued through the quiet university neighborhood where he lived. His street was lined with tall trees, the Victorian-style houses lining the street all on the smaller side, but with inviting porches, many of which were complemented with swings and hanging flower baskets. The residents were, for the most part, professionals from the university. But there were a few others, like Josiah, who added spice to the neighborhood.

He pulled into his driveway and parked in front of the closed garage doors. The small, single-car garage had been renovated into a game room, complete with a pool table, widescreen television, and enough recliners and sofas to accommodate Team Seven.

He climbed out, waiting for Vin to do the same, then locked the Suburban and headed back between the garage and the house to his backyard, which was also small, but well-tended. A four-foot-high chain-link fence separated his yard from the neighbor's who lived directly behind him. The Oscars' dog, a furry Chow-Golden mix named Bear, rumbled out a single bark, then walked to the fence and fluttered his curving tail at them.

Vin smiled at the dog and headed straight to Josiah's tiny covered back porch, grabbing a large Milk-Bone from the huge ceramic cookie jar that took up a small table in one corner, then walked back and fed it to Bear. He reached over the fence and scratched behind the dog's ears as Bear munched happily on the treat.

"That dog has you well-trained," Josiah called as he unlocked the back door and stepped inside, picking up the discarded bag of medications on his way.

A few moments later, Vin joined him in the kitchen, saying, "He's a nice dog."

"Yeah," Josiah agreed. "He is."

Vin dropped into a chair at the table and turned, staring out the window into the backyard while Josiah went about making them some coffee. Bear was lying by the rear fence, his wide head resting on his paws. He looked comfortable and content, and Vin couldn't help but wonder if he'd ever feel either of those things again.

When the coffee was ready, Josiah filled two cups and carried them over to the table and set them down. Vin turned back to the man and said, "You didn't have to bring me here."

"Didn't think you'd want to go back to your place just yet, they're going to need to clean up after—"

"Yeah, I know," Vin interrupted him.

"Would you rather go back out to the ranch?"

Vin shook his head and reached for the sugar, pouring in several heaping spoonfuls before stirring it in.

"You're welcome here, Vin, any time."

Vin looked up at the older man through his long eyelashes and Josiah couldn't help but note Tanner looked all of maybe fifteen at the moment. A lost boy, a hurting boy, and there was noting he could really do to change that.

"Thanks," Vin mumbled, then tucked his chin to his chest and concentrated on sipping his coffee.

"You hungry?"

Vin shook his head.

"Vin, you need to eat something so you can take those antibiotics."

The younger man thought for a moment, then asked hopefully, "You got any of them cinnamon pancakes?"

Josiah grinned. "Well, not made, of course, but I have everything I need to make some; that sound good to you?"

Vin nodded, his attention back on his coffee cup.

"Well, then," the older man replied, "looks like it'll be breakfast for supper tonight."


	12. Supper Conversation

**6:21 p.m.**

Josiah watched as Vin finished off his third helping of the pancakes he had made with a generous dose of cinnamon and applesauce added to the batter. He couldn't help but grin slightly as the last bite disappeared and Vin leaned back, still looking tired, but now full.

"Any more?" he asked the younger man.

"Nope," Vin replied, shaking his head. "I'm stuffed. Thanks for makin' 'em. They're really good."

"My pleasure. How 'bout some more coffee?"

"Okay," Vin replied.

"Hey, why don't you go stretch out on the sofa and I'll bring the coffee out when it's done?"

Vin shook his head. "Naw, I'll help y' with the dishes."

"You sure? You look beat."

"Feel it, too," Tanner replied quietly as he stood and picked up his empty plate, carrying it to the sink and rinsing it off.

"I'm sure you do," the older man replied sadly as he joined Vin so he could rinse off his plate as well. "You want to tell me what happened at your apartment building?"

Vin sighed loudly. "No, not really."

"Will you?"

Another, louder, sigh. "Reckon I ain't got a choice, do I." It wasn't a question.

"Yeah, you do," Josiah told him. "But you know as well as I do that it has to be done. When we catch this guy, we don't want any mistakes some fancy defense attorney can use to spring him, right?"

Vin nodded as he put the drain plug in the sink and began to run hot water into it, adding a squirt of liquid soap along the way. As he watched the bubbles forming, he asked, "Think we'll find him?"

"I do."

The two men fell into a comfortable silence while they waited for the sink to fill to the halfway point. Then, as Vin washed and Josiah dried the dishes, the sniper told the profiler what had happened at his apartment building, sparing no details.

"My apartment!" Vin finished. "The bastard had him in _my_ apartment. How long? If I'd just gone home—"

Josiah shook his head. "There's no way to know how long Chris had been there," Josiah told him. "He must have moved him in during the night, when he was less likely to draw any attention."

"I guess," Vin replied. "But he'd set that stuff up on the roof before then. There was dust on the plastic that was covering the—"

Josiah nodded, agreeing with Tanner's assessment. Nathan had called him earlier, while he was cooking, telling him about what he'd found on the roof of the building, and he already knew what Buck and JD had found inside the apartment when they arrived.

"But if he probably took Chris straight from the ranch to my apartment… He could've—"

"The doctor told me there was no evidence that he touched Chris like that."

"He came all over 'im, J'siah! Ain't no tellin' what he might 'a done."

"Is that why you didn't want to see Chris?"

Vin huffed out a breath and threw the dishrag down on the counter, his hands going to his hips. "No, just knew he was out an'—"

"Vin, I don't believe that. I've seen you when Chris gets hurt, remember? Like last month, when—"

Tanner's cheeks colored a deep red as he turned away, cutting off Josiah's comment. "Hell, J'siah, y' all ready know why I done that."

"Yes, I know. You love him, Vin, and that's why I know there's something going on in your head that's keeping you away from him right now."

Vin swung back, shooting the profiler a hard glare. "I should've—" he started, but then he stopped.

"What, Vin? You should have what? You did everything you could to keep Chris safe. There wasn't a damn thing more you could've done, and I know you know that."

Tanner's expression shifted from anger to anguish. "I should've found a way, J'siah. There had t' be somethin'."

"No, Vin, there wasn't," he said, reaching out to pour them each a fresh cup of coffee. He added sugar to Vin's and handed it to him, saying, "Let's go sit down and I'll tell you what Ezra found out about this guy. Then maybe you'll understand why there was nothing else you could've done."

It was clear Vin didn't want to go sit down, and he didn't want to hear what Josiah had to tell him, but Tanner knew he had to do both. So he accepted the coffee and followed the big man out into the living room, taking a seat on the comfortable sofa. Josiah opted to use his old leather recliner.

"His name is Gene Albert Vine…" Josiah began, laying out what Ezra had uncovered about the man. It took him a while, but he wanted Vin to hear all the facts, and the profiler's take on why the man was doing what he was doing. Vin wasn't too impressed, but he sat and listened in silence until Josiah was finished.

"So y' think he's gonna come back," Vin said with a sigh when Josiah was through.

Sanchez nodded. "Yes, I'm afraid I do."

"When?" Vin asked.

"I don't know," he replied, shaking his head. "It could be soon, or two or three years from now, if he sticks to the same timing."

Vin sighed softly. "He gonna go after Chris again when he does?"

"Maybe, I don't know. He might, or he might come after you. You seem to be his point of fixation. And since we know he managed to capture both encounters with you on some kind of media, chances are he's going to use them for a while. It might make the fixation stronger, or he might get bored and decide to move on to someone else."

Tanner sighed again and slowly shook his head. "Ain't gonna go through that again, J'siah," he said quietly. "Can't do that again."

"It might not happen," Josiah added.

"But y' think it will. I know y' do."

"Yes, I do," the profiler replied, knowing he had to tell the younger man the truth. He knew, in some way he couldn't describe, that Vine would be back, and he would be after Vin. Watching from a distance wouldn't be good enough for him the next time.

"Gonna be different," Vin said, sounding angry. "Ain't gonna do what he wants."

Josiah nodded. "We'll deal with that if it happens. Right now, we need to deal with what's already happened. You did all you could, Vin. You did what you had to, to keep him from hurting Chris."

Vin nodded, but he didn't meet the older man's eyes.

"And I'm sure Chris knows that, too."

"He's gonna know what happened," Vin said, his voice a whisper. "He's gonna know."

Josiah wasn't sure if Tanner was afraid Chris might learn the details of what Vin had done, or if Larabee might guess the reason why Vin had done what he'd been asked to do. "Either way, Vin, he's still going to be your friend."

That prompted an incredulous snort from the sniper. "We'll see," Vin replied, then fought back a yawn.

"You should get some rest," Josiah told him, then added, "Promise me you won't duck out on me during the night, Vin."

Tanner looked up, his expression half-hurt, half-annoyed. "What?"

"Give me your word that you'll stay here tonight. You won't leave." Vin huffed out a sigh, sounding very much like a teenager who'd just been told he had an early curfew. "Vin…"

"All right, fine, I give y' m' word I'll stay put."

"Thank you," Josiah replied, sincerely relieved. If Vin gave his word, it was as good as gold. He smiled thinly. "Now I can get some rest tonight, too."

Vin had the good grace to look a little sheepish when he heard that. "Didn't mean t' be a bother," he told the profiler.

"Never said you were, Vin. I just wanted to make sure you stayed here. You need the rest, and so do I."

"Then go on t' bed. Sofa's good enough for me. Hell, it's more comfortable 'n Larabee's."

"I'll get you a couple of blankets and a pillow," Josiah told him.


	13. The Dream II

Several hours later, Josiah slept soundly in his bed. On the sofa, Vin slept as well, but with that rest came the dreams…

He was in his own apartment. He knew that, even though he wasn't sure how. It was still dark outside, the room shrouded in an inky stillness that drew him from his sleep. He lay still and opened his eyes, peering into the blackness. He couldn't see anything, just a slight glint of moonlight that reflected off the window in his room.

He stared at that pale light for a long moment, trying to decide what was bothering him about it. Then he knew. The window was open…

He had no more than started to sit up when he felt it. It flowed over his legs, encasing his flesh and locking him in place. It was then he realized that there were no covers on the bed, and he was naked. The sensation continued, flowing up his legs and over his buttocks. It felt like liquid rubber coating his body, making it impossible for him to move. When it had completely encased him, he floated up off the surface of the bed and rolled over in the air.

He was floating several feet over his bed.

A small light, like a night-light, came on in the room. It was a dim amber color, but strong enough that he could see Chris, sitting tied in a chair in the room. It was one of his kitchen table chairs and, for a moment, he couldn't understand how it had gotten into his bedroom, but then he heard it: the Voice.

_"Are you awake now, pet?"_

Vin wanted to speak. He wanted to tell the Voice to go to hell, but when he opened his mouth, no sounds came out.

From where he hung, suspended in the air, he could see a darker shadow gliding up to hover behind Chris. A piece of that shadow reached out and caressed Larabee's cheek. The blond flinched away from the touch like it had burned him.

 _Leave him alone!_ Vin cried silently.

_"Mmm, you want me to leave him alone?"_

_Yes_ , Vin replied, fear making him begin to sweat.

The shadow drifted out from behind Chris and floated over so it was next to him. _"I'll promise not to touch him, if you allow me to touch_ you _instead. Will you let me touch you, pet?"_

Vin didn't want to say it, but he knew he had no choice. _Yes_ , he replied.

 _"Mmm, that's what I was hoping you'd say, pet,"_ the Voice purred from the shadow.

Suddenly, Vin felt himself falling. He landed on the mattress, and the second he did, leather restraints encircled his wrists and ankles, securing him to the bed. He tried to fight them, but he couldn't move.

The shadow circled the bed slowly, floating in the air. Then it seemed to break apart, as if someone had waved their hand through a thick cloud of cigarette smoke. Thin tendrils curled down over him, two wrapping around his nipples and hardening into the same kind of clips he'd been forced to use on the roof. He gasped and cried out as they pinched closed on the sensitive nubs, but still no sound came from his mouth.

More of the smoky tendrils wrapped around his cock and balls, tightening painfully. There was a pressure on his genitals, like a blood pressure cuff was being inflated, and, when it was finished, he had been made hard and leaking.

" _You respond so well, pet_ ," the Voice purred. " _I think you like it_."

 _No!_ Vin cried, but there was no audible word.

" _See how he watches you?_ " the Voice continued, and Vin glanced over at Chris. He was awake and staring at him, a look of disgust on his face.

 _No!_ Vin yelled. _It's not like that! I don't like it!_

" _Why don't you show him how much you like it, pet? Lift your legs for me_."

 _No!_ Vin snarled, but he could feel his legs rising anyway. He had no way to stop them. They were up and wantonly splayed open, and he watched as another tendril of smoke curled from the shadowy figure, this one pressing into his ass like a probing finger. His body jerked with multiple spasms.

Chris' expression became even more disgusted.

" _Mmm, yes, that's right. Show him how much you like it, pet_."

The single finger in his ass grew to two, then three. An invisible sucking began on his cock. His body reacted, his hips beginning to rock, responding to the twin sensations that assailed him.

 _Stop! Stop!_ he cried. _Stop!_ But his body refused to obey him.

The shadow flew around his bed in circles, picking up speed. And, as it did, the fingers invading his ass fucked him faster and faster, and the sucking on his cock increased.

He moaned – the first sound he'd made that he actually heard. He wanted it to stop, but his body was getting off on it. He looked down between his legs as the object in his ass was pulled free. He saw the pancake turner floating in the air, the hard handle dripping with lube. Then it swung around and, a moment later, the flat of the turning surface slapped against his ass cheek.

He yelped in surprise and pain.

He was struck again, then again and again.

He tried to fight his way free, but he couldn't move. His ass was paddled until he could feel blood running down his ass cheeks, dripping off to soak into the mattress below him.

Then, finally, it was over.

He floated up off the bed again and was rolled over so he was peering down at the blood-stained mattress. The hotcake turner swung around again and flew toward him, the handle sinking deeply into his ass.

He screamed, but there was no sound that escaped his lips.

The handle began to swell until it was as thick and as long as the dildos had been, then it began piercing him, again and again. He fought, he struggled, but nothing made any difference.

Invisible hands began to squeeze and pull on his cock.

Vin tried to pull himself into a ball, but he couldn't even do that.

The assault continued, the only sounds to escape Tanner's throat an occasional moan, each sounding like a moan of pleasure.

Chris' lip curled back from his teeth in a clear expression of his repugnance. Finally, he looked away, leaving Vin to endure the attack alone.

And it continued.

The bit was back in his mouth, and an unseen hand was squeezing his balls, crushing them, another fisting his cock so hard it felt like it might be torn off at any moment, and, in his ass, the massive dildo ripped him open as it plunged into him again and again.

He screamed. He begged for it to end. He sobbed and cursed, but nothing helped him, nothing made it stop. Nothing, until his body exploded with an orgasm that was both excruciatingly painful and pleasurable at the same time. His body jerked with muscle-tearing spasms, his cock shooting out streams of semen and blood that soaked the mattress under him.

And, when it finally came to an end, he fell from where he was floating above the mattress, landing in the mix of blood and semen with a wet _splat_. He trembled and shook, trying to breathe, trying to move, trying to crawl away, but he still couldn't move. The shadow floated above him, then slowly began to drop until it was like a shroud covering him.

He whimpered.

" _Yes, pet, that was wonderful. So good._ "

The shadow began to seep under his skin.

 _No!_ he shrieked, but it was too late. The shadow was disappearing into him.

_Now I'm with you, pet. I'm a part of you. I'll always be a part of you._

"No!"

"Vin?"

Vin jerked awake, sitting up and gulping in air like he was drowning. Kneeling next to the sofa was Josiah, looking worried.

"Are you all right, son?"

Vin met Josiah's eyes in the semidarkness and he shook his head.

The big man stood and sat down on the sofa behind Vin, then reached out and pulled the younger man back into him, holding him. "It's all right," he said quietly. "I've got you, Vin. You're safe now."

He could feel Vin shaking and hoped the man wasn't headed straight for another trip to the hospital. But this time, there was no throwing up and no shock, just a flood of tears Tanner couldn't choke off. And, through it all, Josiah held him, assuring him that he wasn't alone, assuring him that it would get better – eventually.

Finally, some time later, Vin's tears ran dry and he slumped back against the profiler, too exhausted and drained to move. Josiah held him, rubbing his arms and back, words left behind. But Vin didn't need words. The reassuring presence holding his fragile world together was all that mattered.

They remained like that until after the sun had come up, chasing away the last of the lingering shadows from the night before.

Vin began to speak, thoughts and feelings, dreams and reality tumbling out of his mouth. The profiler sat and listened, he squeezed and cried. And, when it was over, he called Dr. La Melisande, asking her if she could come over.

Half an hour later, she was there.


	14. Chris Awakes

**7:47 a.m.**

Buck yawned and stretched where he was sitting in Chris' room. He heard his neck and back pop and knew he should have gone back to the waiting room to use one of the sofas to nap on, but it was too late now. He'd just have to make an appointment with the chiropractor when things settled down.

"Buck?"

The ladies' man swiveled on the seat of the chair he was in, peering at the man in the bed. Green eyes were open and staring back at him. "Hey, stud," he said with a spreading smile. "How are you doing?"

Chris blinked, then licked his too-dry lips and said, "Sore."

Buck nodded. "Yeah, well, that'll probably fade in a couple of days."

Larabee's forehead wrinkled with confusion. "Where's Vin?"

Buck drew in a breath and dropped his gaze to the floor. "He's, uh, with, uh, Josiah…"

"He all right?" Chris asked, looking for and finding the controls for his bed. He pressed a button and waited for the head of it to lift so he wasn't lying flat on his back anymore.

"No, not really," Wilmington replied. Josiah had called him after Dr. La Melisande had arrived and taken Vin into the kitchen to talk, telling him about the nightmare – sans details. But he'd heard enough to know Vin wasn't doing all that well.

The blond sighed.

Pulling his head up and squaring his shoulders, Buck asked, "What do you remember?"

Chris met his eyes for a brief moment, then looked away, saying, "Think I better ask you what happened first."

The fact that Chris was protecting Vin gave Buck a warm, fuzzy feeling, and he couldn't stop the small smile that lifted the corners of his mouth. "Guess we all know more 'n we have a right to."

"Who was that fucking bastard?"

"Long story, one Ezra can fill you in on better than I can. He's the one who found him."

"Something about him was familiar," Larabee told him, eyes cold with simmering rage.

Buck nodded. "Home Depot; the guy who came out to assess your roof for repairs."

That rounded Chris' eyes with surprise. "Home—? Jesus fucking Christ."

"We figured he got you in the parking lot of that bread place…" Buck prompted, hoping Chris was up to talking about it.

Larabee nodded. "I'd just opened the door to the Ram after I picked up those bagels Vin likes. I saw him, thought he looked familiar, but I hadn't placed him. He was parked in front of me, was a couple of spots behind me in line… He came up behind me, on the way to his car. Used a Taser on me, pushed me into the Ram… He used something on me that knocked me out – smelled funny. Next thing I remember, I woke up lying in the bed of the Ram, duct-taped, no shirt on, and that bastard was hitting me with some kind 'a quirt or something."

"Crop," Buck supplied.

"He called Vin. I tried— I heard what he said to him," Chris added, looking away again.

"That boy…" Buck began, but then shook his head. "He did his best to make sure the son of a bitch didn't hurt you, Chris."

"Yeah, I know he did," Chris replied, still not looking at the ladies' man.

"What you do remember next?" Buck asked.

"Woke up again outside Vin's apartment building, but I didn't know it at the time. He kept that damn duct tape around my eyes. I was woozy, like I was drunk or something. He took me up to Vin's apartment, undressed me, taped up my hands and feet again. I don't remember how long I was lying there on the bed. I was probably out for a good part of it, but I remember hearing him watching something. What he'd seen Vin doing out at the ranch, I think. Gave me a blow-by-blow while he watched. Think I was alone there for a while, too. The wooziness finally wore off. He called Vin again, told him to come to his apartment. That's when I knew where I was. Then…"

"Yeah, I know," Buck said.

"Then he— he held my nose, forced me to drink something."

"Chloral hydrate," Buck supplied. "He slipped you a Mickey. I'm surprised you remember as much as you do, to be honest."

Chris shot the man a sour look. "Kind of hard to forget."

The ladies' man nodded his understanding.

"Where's Vin? In the hospital, too?"

"No, he's at Josiah's place."

"I want to see him," Chris said, and his tone made it clear he wouldn't take no for an answer.

Buck nodded. "I'm sure you do, but I don't think he's ready to see you just yet, stud."

"But—"

Buck held up his hand, stopping the man before he could get started. "I want you to answer me this, Chris," he said, his voice quiet and intense. "Why would he do all that for you?"

Larabee started to answer, but then he stopped himself, the enormity of what Vin had been through finally registering for the first time. He closed his mouth and swallowed hard. He had an answer; he just wasn't sure he wanted it to be _the_ answer, but, given the look on Buck's face, it was.

"Shit," he breathed.

Buck's expression turned to one of sympathy, but Chris wasn't sure whom he was feeling sorry for, him, or Vin.

Larabee swallowed again. "I still need to see him."

"I'll call Josiah, see how he's doing."

"Guess he— must have been—"

Buck nodded. "Worse," he said. "I'll go make that call. If Ezra's around, I'll send him in to tell you about that bastard."

Chris nodded, his heart feeling heavy in his chest. _Damn, Vin. Damn._


	15. Helping Hand

**10:10 a.m.**

Chris muted the volume on the small television in his room when he heard a light knock on his door. A moment later, Josiah leaned into his room.

"You wanted to see me?" the profiler asked. Chris gestured for the man to come in and, a moment later, Josiah was at his bedside, asking, "So, when are they going to spring you?"

Larabee shook his head. "I don't know. Sometime today, I think. Something about my ulcer medication and the drug… ask Nathan, he seems to understand all the gobbledygook the doctors told me. They took some more blood a while ago. If there's something there, or not there – I can't keep it straight – they'll let me go home."

Josiah grinned, able to hear the frustration in the team leader's voice. "Well, I'm sure they know what they're doing," he assured the man.

"I guess," Larabee grumbled. Then he looked up at the profiler and asked, "What's going on with Vin?"

Josiah knew this conversation might take a while, so he walked over and grabbed the chair that was sitting near the window and carried it back to the bedside and sat down. He leaned forward slightly, resting his elbows on his knees, and said, "You have to understand, what Vin went through was a traumatic event."

"No shit," Chris said. "You think I don't get that? I just want to see him."

Josiah leaned back and folded his arms over his chest. "I know you do, but he's not ready to see you just yet."

"Why? I was there, Josiah. I know what that bastard—"

The profiler sighed softly and held up his hand to stop the man. He searched for the right words. "Chris, when we experience a trauma, it shakes the foundations of our beliefs about ourselves, our safety, our assumptions about trust. Vin's having trouble trusting himself right now, and, as a result, he's not sure he can trust you to react the way he wants you to. I don't think he really trusts any of us at the moment, to be honest."

"But I know none of this is his fault, Josiah," Chris argued. "Ezra told me about Vine. That sick son of a bitch is the one I blame, not Vin."

"You're thinking rationally," Josiah said, "but Vin isn't. Think back to when you lost your wife. Did you think or feel anything that resembled rational?"

"I'm not dead," Larabee countered, not wanting to remember back to that time. "And I went though some of this with him."

"Doesn't matter," Josiah told him. "In his mind, he's lost you, because he doesn't think you'll see him the same way you did before. Trauma has a strong subjective component in people's responses. You and I have talked before about the fact we think Vin's life has been a hard one. If that's true, then this event is going to resonate with past traumas as well."

Chris sighed heavily and sagged back against his pillow. "What can I do?"

"Right now, the best thing you can do is give him a little time to get his feet back under him."

"And how long is that going to take?"

Josiah shrugged and shook his head as he said, "I can't answer that. He's talking with a trauma specialist, and I'm sure that's going to help, but I just can't tell you when."

Chris huffed out a breath and nodded. "All right, but I want to know how he's doing."

Josiah nodded. "I'll tell you as much as I can. To be honest, his willingness to talk about what happened, to me, to the specialist, has really surprised me – pleasantly surprised. And I think it's because he feels like he has a place here with all of us."

"But he thinks he's lost that?" Chris asked.

"He's scared he might have, yes, but I think some part of him knows he hasn't."

Larabee met the profiler's eyes as he asked, "That true for everyone?"

Josiah didn't hesitate; he nodded. "As far as I can tell, everyone has just been worried about Vin and you. He's getting support from everyone."

Chris dropped his gaze, unsure how to ask the next question. "Takes a damn good friend to walk that mile for you."

Josiah nodded as he said, "If you ask me, it takes more than a friend."

That brought an involuntary blush to Larabee's cheeks. "A good friend, a brother."

"Chris, you can call it 'friendship,' or 'family,' but I think you know as well as I do, Vin did what he did because he loves you. He was doing his level best to protect you the only way he could."

Chris looked away. "He can't love me, not like you mean. Like a brother, sure, but—"

"Chris, he loves you, just like you loved Sarah."

"He can't," Chris told him, his tone insistent.

"Why?" Josiah asked.

"Because I'm not gay, or bisexual," Larabee said quietly.

"And Vin is?"

That brought Chris' head up, green eyes flashing. "If he feels the way you say he does, then yeah, I guess he'd have to be."

"How does that make you feel?" Josiah asked him.

"I—" Chris started, then stopped. He thought for a moment and then said, "I don't care if he's gay, bisexual, or whatever. He's part of my team. He's my friend, my brother."

Josiah nodded. "I didn't think you'd care if he was gay, and yes, he's our friend, our teammate, our brother. But that doesn't change the fact that he's in love with you, and you need to think about how you're going to deal with that, because how you do is going to have a huge impact on that young man, and how he deals with this."

Chris swallowed hard. "Josiah, I—"

"You don't have to have an answer right now, Chris. I'm just telling you to think about it, and think carefully. You need to understand exactly how you feel about Vin, and then you need to be as open and honest about those feelings as you can be with him."

"What difference does it make if I can't see him to talk to him?"

"You'll see him, Chris, probably before you're ready to. It's just not going to be today."

"All right," Chris said with a defeated sigh.

Josiah stood and looked down at his friend, then he reached out and gave the man's should a gentle squeeze. "Be patient, give him a little time."

"I will," Larabee promised.

"And it might not be a bad idea if you talked to a specialist, too."

That surprised the blond. "Why? I'm all right. I—"

"Chris, I know you've come though this physically, but trust me, things like this, they have a way of sneaking up and biting you on the ass. If you can talk to someone now, it'll help you, and, in the long run, it'll help Vin, too. Just… think about it, okay?"

Larabee nodded.

"All right, I need to get back and see if Dee is finished with Vin."

"Dee?" Chris asked.

"Dr. Damiane La Melisande," Josiah explained. "If you want to talk to someone, ask for her."

Chris nodded again.

The profiler turned and started out of the room.

Larabee stopped him just before he reached the door, saying, "I love him, too, Josiah, just… not like that."

Josiah nodded, then turned and said, "Love is a gift, Chris. Just be honest with him, that's all he needs from you, all he'll ever need."

"But if I can't love him the way—"

"Then he'll take whatever you can give him. Trust me."

And with that, Josiah turned and left, leaving Chris lying in his bed and wondering, if the situation was reversed, whether that would be enough for him, and knowing that it wouldn't be.

That made him feel like he was letting Vin down, but he wasn't sure if there was a way he could avoid that. There didn't seem to be.

And that just sucked.

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

Josiah watched as Vin picked at his dinner, eating no more than three bites in the entire time they had been sitting there. And Vin hadn't met the profiler's eyes once during the entire meal, either.  "Tough session today?" he asked softly, hoping he might get the sniper talking.

Vin shrugged, but he didn't look up or speak.

"Can't be easy… reliving what happened—" Before he could finish, Vin shoved back his chair and lurched to his feet. He lumbered off, body held stiffly upright. Josiah recognized it for what it was and stood, following after the younger man. When he reached the closed bathroom door, he paused, listening.

The unmistakable sound of retching could be heard coming from inside.

"Vin," he called, trying the knob, but the door had been locked from the inside. "Vin, let me help you… Please?" He could remember all too clearly how Tanner had looked when he'd arrived at the ranch after Vine's first call… "Vin, please…"

"G' away," came the muffled reply.

Josiah's eyes closed as he sighed softly. "All right, but I'm going to go put on some tea – something to help settle your stomach."

But, as it turned out, Vin didn't return to the kitchen. When Josiah finally went looking for the younger man, he found him curled up on the sofa, the blanket he usually kept draped over the back wrapped tightly around himself. Vin was buried under it, hiding or passed out, he couldn't be sure which.

Deciding that the best thing he could do for Vin at the moment was allow him to sleep – or hide – Josiah returned to the kitchen, finishing the dishes. When he was done he went to his bedroom, spending the next hour reading. When his eyelids began to droop, he slid his book onto the nightstand, and turned off the light, quickly falling to sleep.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

Josiah wasn't sure how long he'd been asleep, but he knew something had woken him. He lay, listening, but didn't hear anything coming from the living room, so he doubted it was another nightmare, pulling Vin to screaming consciousness.

He sighed and turned over onto his back, hoping he could get back to sleep, but the niggling feeling of something being not quite right refused to let him.

He was just about to turn over again when he heard it – a soft, frightened-sounding whisper. "'Siah?"

"Vin?" he said, sitting up in his bed. A moment later, the younger man appeared at his bedside, the blanket from the sofa still draped over his shoulders. Then he heard it, the sound that he knew had awoken him – Vin's teeth were chattering.

"C-cold," Vin said.

Without hesitation, Josiah slid over, tossing back his blankets and saying, "Come here, Vin."

The blanket hit the floor and Vin slid into the bed, zeroing right in on the vacated warm spot. He lay down and curled up on his side, his knees drawn up to his chest.

Josiah reached over and flipped the covers over the sniper, then lay down himself. When he heard the younger man's teeth still chattering, he scooted closer to Vin. "Come here," he said again, offering Vin the shelter of his arm, hoping a little body warmth might chase the chill away.

Vin uncurled and moved to him, seeking the comfort he so desperately needed. Josiah wrapped his arm around Vin's back and pulled him closer, holding him.

Vin snaked his arm over Josiah's chest, holding on to the older man for all he was worth.

"Bad dream?" the profiler asked quietly.

Vin nodded.

Josiah heard an answering stifled sob as well. "It's going to get better, I promise."

Vin clung to him tighter, his diaphragm jerking as he silently cried.

Josiah continued to hold him, his hand rubbing up and down Vin's back, pausing from time to time on the back of Vin's head, where he carded his fingers through the man's hair as best he could, hoping it was giving Tanner some comfort. He wasn't sure how long the tears lasted, or if any had actually fallen, but there had been a catharsis of some kind, and Josiah felt it when Vin finally began to relax against him. He kept up the gentle touch, hoping it might lull Vin back to sleep.

"'Siah…?"

"Mmm?"

Several seconds passed, enough so Josiah decided Vin wasn't going to ask or say whatever he'd started to, and he didn't want to push Vin, not right now. He was too fragile, too vulnerable.

"Why d' I still want—?"

"Want what, Vin?" he asked softly, his hand rubbing along Vin's arm.

"T' be with Chris."

Josiah frowned in the darkness. "Because you love him," he stated matter-of-factly.

"Shouldn't."

"Why not?"

"'M dirty now…"

"No, Vin, you're not."

Tanner nodded. "Feels dirty, J'siah. Feels like he's crawlin' all over me, all the time. Can't love Chris with him on me like this…"

"Vin—" Josiah started, but he stopped short when Tanner's hand shifted, coming up to rest on his bare chest, his fingertips brushing lightly over one of the profiler's nipples.

The older man's mind raced as he tried to decide what to do. He'd always found Vin attractive, and he'd always considered the man his friend, but he knew, with absolute certainty, that Vin's heart belonged to Chris – always had. So why was he touching him like this?

But he knew. Down deep, he understood.

"Vin," he said softly, trying to ignore the pleasure that was being created as Vin continued to stroke his fingertip lightly over the now-hard nipple, "you don't really want this."

Vin nodded. "Yes, I do."

"No, you want Chris. You want him to get well and go home from the hospital, and you want him to hold you, and make love to you, and tell you that he loves you, that he _still_ loves you, no matter what you had to do to keep him safe."

Vin's finger paused, his hand dropping down to press against the older man's ribs. "Feel so damn dirty… like I'll never be clean again."

"Which is a natural reaction," he assured the man. "I know Dee's told you that, hasn't she?"

Vin nodded. Then, a few moments later came a "Why?" Tanner's voice breaking, pleading.

"Why? Why what, Vin? You mean why do you feel dirty?"

Vin shook his head, pressing himself tightly to Josiah's side, and the profiler could feel Tanner's erection.

"Why am I still like this?" Vin asked.

Josiah wasn't sure what "this" was – aroused? But before he could ask, Vin continued on his own.

"How c'n I still want t' be with a man after what he made me do?"

"Oh, Vin," Josiah said, reaching up and cupping the back of the man's head. "There's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to be with the one you love."

"Feels wrong. Feels dirty. Don't want t' feel like that no more, J'siah."

"Vin, you've been violated. What you're feeling is a normal reaction to that kind of trauma. The feeling will fade with time and work, I promise."

"Can't stop wantin' 'im," Vin continued as if he hadn't heard a word Josiah had just said. "Can't stop lovin' 'im."

"Vin, there's nothing wrong with love. And there's nothing wrong with a man loving a man. It's as natural as any other kind of love."

Vin's hand moved again, touching the still-hard nub once more. "Will y' love me, 'Siah?"

"Of course, I love you," the older man replied.

"No," Vin said, his voice soft and strained, "want y' t' make love t' me."

"Vin, you love Chris."

"Need t' feel clean again, 'Siah," Vin said, pressing his rock-hard cock against Josiah's hip. "Please… Please, 'Siah… Need y'…"

"Shh," Josiah responded, reaching over with his free hand, touching Vin's face, stroking his cheek, trying to comfort him, and unable to deny that there was a part of him that wanted Vin – wanted to make love to him, to help him forget for just a little while. But it was wrong. He would be taking advantage of Vin if he acted on his own attraction.

"'Siah," Vin whimpered, humping against the older man's hip. "Just want ya t' make me clean again. Please," he begged, the word cut off slightly as his throat closed. "Please," he tried again a few seconds later, his hand sliding from Josiah's aching nipple to close around his slowly filling cock.

"Vin," Josiah said, his hand shooting down to grab the younger man's wrist and pull his hand away from his traitorous cock, "I'm not the one you want."

Vin rose up slightly, peering down at Josiah as he said, "Yer wrong, J'siah. Always wanted y', always loved y', too, jist ain't like how I love 'n' want Chris… but it's there."

Josiah smiled in the darkness. "And you know I love you, too, Vin, but I'd be taking advantage—"

"No!" Vin cried. " _He_ did that! I _need_ y', J'siah. Need y' bad. Want ya t' get 'im off m' skin," he begged, pressing his cheek to Josiah's chest. "Please, 'Siah. Please, make 'im go away…"

"Oh, Vin," the older man breathed, releasing Tanner's hand and holding him as he tried to decide what to do. That part of him that was a trained psychologist knew he should stop, call Dee, and force Vin to sit and talk this out with her. But that part of him who was Vin's friend wanted to help him, wanted to take away the pain, give him anything he wanted, but he wasn't sure he could.

But he also knew that he didn't have a choice. Right or wrong, Vin needed him, right now, and he wasn't about to let the man down, even if he suspected he would regret it later.

He could still feel Vin's erection pressed against his leg, and, as he lay there, trying to decide what to do, Vin ground himself against Josiah's hip and whimpered.

"'Siah…"

That sound and that single word galvanized the older man and set him in motion. He wrapped his arms around Vin and rolled him over onto his back, himself coming up onto his elbow. He leaned over Vin, tenderly kissing his forehead, his closed eyes, his cheeks, and, finally, his lips.

"Vin, I shouldn't do this," he tried, but Tanner just lifted his head, forcing their lips back together.

Then Vin moaned softly, with undisguised need, and his lips parted. Josiah plunged his tongue into the younger man's mouth without a second thought, one of his own secret fantasies coming to life in his arms, and he was just too weak to walk away.

Vin pressed his head up again, grinding his lips against Josiah's teeth. The profiler knew then that his thought of making this a gentle lovemaking wasn't going to work. Vin was too needy, too desperate.

Josiah reached out and pressed Vin back against the mattress, forcing his tongue deeper into the man's mouth as he did, and Vin's body shook in reaction, goose bumps coming up across his skin.

Reaching down, Josiah grabbed the hem of the T-shirt Vin wore – one of Sanchez's old ones that he'd loaned the younger man – and yanked it up. He shifted position, his lips and teeth attacking Vin's closest nipple.

Tanner cried out, his chest arching into the assault, the younger man gulping in air like he was drowning. Vin's hands came up, his fingers curling into Josiah's hair, keeping him focused on the obviously sensitive nub.

Vin's overwhelming need brought Josiah to full hardness. He dropped lower, his tongue teasing around the rim of Tanner's bellybutton, making the younger man squirm beneath him.

With a resolute sigh, Josiah pulled away from Vin. "Undress," Josiah instructed, watching as Tanner stripped out of the T-shirt and the sweatpants he was wearing in record time. The older man only had to remove his boxer shorts, then he gathered Vin to him, nearly covering the sniper with his body, kissing him again, hoping he could delay the inevitable, but Vin was beyond waiting.

"Please, 'Siah," Tanner panted as Josiah sucked one nipple into his mouth. "Want y' inside me… Need y' inside me…"

Josiah's head came up. "Vin—"

"Need y', 'Siah. Inside. Please…"

"All right, all right," Josiah soothed. "But I'm not going to hurt you, Vin."

The man whined, his hips lifting, his hard cock straining up along his belly.

Sanchez cursed softly, the sound undoing his resolve to go slowly… He sighed and reached over Vin to fumble open the drawer of his nightstand. Feeling inside, he located the bottle of liquid KY and fished it out.

Before he could even open the cap, Vin had rolled onto his left side, his right leg bending at the knee, giving Josiah full access to his ass.

The profiler swallowed hard and squeezed some of the slick liquid onto his fingers, then reached down and rubbed it over the tight pucker, making Vin groan with mounting need.

Josiah carefully sank one thick finger into the tight channel, finger-fucking the younger man as he worked to prepare him as quickly as he could.

"Now, 'Siah, need y' inside me _now_."

"Soon," Sanchez replied, determined he wouldn't hurt Vin. Pulling his finger out, he squeezed out more KY and pressed two into the squirming man.

"Ah," Vin gasped, pressing his hips back, trying to sink the fingers in deeper. " _Please_ , 'Siah!" he wailed.

Josiah knew Vin wasn't ready, but it appeared he was as ready as he was going to get. The older man made sure his cock was well lubed, then grabbed the base and guided himself to Vin's waiting ass. Tanner stilled, waiting, his body trembling.

Josiah found the right spot and drew a deep breath, silently praying he didn't hurt Vin too badly, then pressed his hips forward, not letting up until the head of his cock slipped inside.

Vin sighed loudly, his body shaking more, but relaxing, his ass opening, allowing Josiah to sink in deeper.

Each time Josiah met resistance, he paused, waiting. And, each time, it didn't take long before Vin was humping back against him, sinking Sanchez deeper.

When Josiah was fully sheathed inside Vin, he reached out, running his hand along Vin's leg, petting him as he began to move, slowly at first, just a couple of inches sliding in and out.

Vin hissed through clenched teeth, letting himself get lost in the sensations being visited on his body. "More," he gasped, lifting his leg, hooking his arm under his knees to hold it up.

Josiah picked up his pace, sliding in and out of the tight, almost too-hot channel, praying now that he could hold off long enough to let Vin have his pleasure.

Vin pulled his leg higher and Josiah reached out, holding on to it as he drove in deeper and faster than before.

"Hard, 'Siah, harder," Vin panted, his hand dropping to grab his leaking cock, jerking frantically on it.

"Wait, Vin, wait," the older man said, shifting, trying to make the move he wanted to make without breaking the connection between them, but the lube was so slick he slipped free of Vin's ass.

"No!" Tanner cried, blue eyes flying open. "J'siah!"

"Easy, Vin, easy," he soothed, pulling Vin over onto his back and lifting his legs.

"'Siah," Vin moaned, tossing his head.

Josiah grabbed his cock, sliding all the way back inside Vin with one strong stab.

"Yes!" Vin hissed, giving over his body to the older man to use.

And Josiah leaned forward, driving into the younger man with the force and speed Tanner needed.

Vin's hand returned to his cock, jerking himself with short, savage strokes, his head arching back, his ass tightening as his gland was struck, again and again.

"'Siah!" Vin cried, come erupting from his cock, spraying over Josiah's chest.

Feeling Vin's come landing on his skin was all Josiah could take. He rammed his cock into Vin's ass and came, his hips humping strongly as he did.

When he could, Josiah sank back, trying to catch his breath. His softening cock sipped from Tanner's ass and he lowered Vin's legs. And, a moment later, Vin was on his knees in the center of the bed, his arms wrapped around Josiah, sobbing.

"Easy, Vin, easy," Sanchez said, stroking Tanner's naked, sweat-coated back. Between them, he could feel the younger man was still hard, although he couldn't imagine how that was possible, given the amount of come that was dripping down his skin.

Vin continued to sob, although Josiah felt no tears falling from the man's eyes. "Shh," he said, holding Vin, rocking him.

"Need y' some more," Vin whispered. "Please…" He pulled back and turned around, presenting his raised ass to Josiah.

"Vin, I don't think—"

"Use yer fingers," Vin said, tone still edged with more desperation than the profiler liked.

Josiah swallowed, but he knew he couldn't leave Vin wanting. He felt around for the KY, squeezed more onto his fingers and slid two of them inside the man. Vin's hole was still stretched open, giving him easy access.

"More," Vin groaned, pressing back, meeting Josiah's thrusts.

Josiah added a third finger, using them to take Vin a second time. And, to his very great surprise, he found himself growing hard again as Vin moaned and grunted, impaling himself again and again.

As soon as he was hard enough, Josiah pulled his fingers free, replacing them with his cock.

"Ah!" Vin cried, grinding his ass back against Josiah's groin.

The big profiler reached down, taking hold of Tanner's hips and spearing him with deep, hard thrusts, his cock quickly swelling to full hardness once more.

Vin moaned and gurgled, reveling in the feel of Josiah's balls slapping against his ass, his cock filling him. "Harder," he begged, squeezing his muscles.

His hips were jerked tighter against Josiah's groin, his hole ravaged harder and deeper. And Vin surrendered himself to it, losing himself in it, letting it sear all the filth from him, letting it purify him. When he came, he screamed.

Josiah rode through Vin's climax, the wild dance of the younger man's muscles nearly undoing him. But his unexpected second erection, so soon after his own orgasm, meant he had more staying power this time, and he made it though the roiling storm of the man's orgasm.

When he finally felt Vin's muscles go slack, he slowed his thrusts, enjoying the feel of sliding in and out of Tanner with slow, deep thrusts. It was almost teasing, and, a few minutes later, Vin moaned softly and began to circle his hips, enjoying the sweet lovemaking.

"That's right," Josiah said softly, knowing Vin could finally hear him past his need. "You feel me?"

"Yes," Vin breathed.

"You feel me inside you?"

"I feel y', 'Siah…"

"You're not dirty, Vin. You never were. What he did to you was wrong. How you feel about Chris, that's not wrong, or bad, or dirty. It's normal. _You're_ normal. You're a good man, Vin Tanner, and I'm damn glad that you're my friend, glad that you trust me enough to let me help you like this."

Vin moaned again, his body rousing in response to Josiah's words. He began to rock his hips back to meet the older man's thrusts, but it was without the frenzy of before.

Josiah leaned forward, then reached down and found Vin's half-full cock, stroking it tenderly, loving it, loving Vin.

When Tanner was fully hard once more, Josiah slowed, then stopped, pulling carefully from Vin's ass.

The younger man whimpered, but it wasn't from desperate need, just frustration.

"Turn over," Josiah said, waiting as Vin did as he was told.

Vin bent his knees and spread his legs open. "Love me, 'Siah."

The older man smiled. "Now, _that_ I can do, Vin," he said, moving between the man's legs, sinking back into the welcoming heat of Tanner's body. This time, he took his time, loving Vin the way he'd wanted to from the start.

And when they came at the same time, minutes later, it was a shared experience.

They collapsed together as well, Vin cuddling up next to Josiah, both men holding and being held, both trying to ignore the various wet spots they encountered on the sheets.

"J'siah," Vin breathed, his eyes dropping closed.

"Mmm?"

"Thank you."

"You're welcome, my friend."

"Ain't just yer friend," Vin slurred. "We's family."

"Amen, brother, amen," Josiah said, pulling Vin closer, feeling it as the younger man fell asleep. He bent his head and pressed a kiss to the top of Vin's head. "We are family, Vin," he whispered. "And I will always love you… And if Chris doesn't get his head out of his ass, I'm going to steal you away from him."

But he knew he couldn't, not really. Vin's heart belonged to Chris, and always would. But if Chris didn't come around, he knew now it would fall to him to care for Vin's body, and his soul. Vin's heart, however, would always belong to Chris.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

When Josiah woke in the morning, it was to the feel of a mouth on his cock. He sucked in a breath, stiffening, then remembered the night before.

"Vin," he breathed.

The younger man looked up at him, saying, "Want t' make y' feel good, J'siah."

"You don't—"

But Vin dropped his head, sucking Josiah back into his mouth, and the older man couldn't stop his hips from pressing up, or halt the soft moan that escaped his lips.

"Vin, you—"

Tanner's fingers pressed into the crack of the profiler's ass, one poking into the man's hole.

Josiah grunted, unaccustomed to the violation, but his body adjusted quickly, enjoying the sensations Vin was creating. But it was what the younger man's mouth was doing that had the profiler's fingers curling into the man's hair.

"Vin," he said, knowing he was getting close.

But that only seemed to spur Tanner on, and he swallowed Josiah deeper, the feel of the man humming around his cock pushing the older man over the edge. His hips bucked up and he came, Vin drinking it down.

Josiah closed his eyes, panting, his body having surprised him once more.

A moment later, Vin was pressed up against him, holding him. Josiah wrapped an arm around the man and pulled him close, surprised to discover Tanner wasn't hard.

"Why—?" he started, but Vin cut him off.

"Wanted to thank you… for last night."

"You didn't need to. Last night was its own thanks, Vin," he said.

"I just wanted you to know it meant a lot to me… that you'd do that for me," Vin said softly.

Josiah opened his eyes and looked at the sniper. "Vin, I care about you, deeply. You do understand that, right?"

Vin nodded, his face coloring. The effect was more than enough to make Sanchez smile.

"Vin, do you think you deserve to be loved?" he asked.

The question seemed to catch the younger man off guard. He opened his mouth to reply, then didn't. He thought for a moment, then said, "I guess so."

"You are," Josiah said. "Do you think you deserve Chris' love?"

Vin immediately looked away. "He ain't like me."

"You mean he isn't gay?"

Vin nodded.

"So what if he isn't? He could be bisexual, or maybe just open-minded. We don't fit into nice, neat little boxes, Vin."

"I guess," Vin said.

"We don't," Josiah said. "I want you to see Dee today, okay?"

Vin sighed.

"Vin…"

Another sigh, but Tanner nodded, adding a moment later, "But only if y' love me again."

Josiah chuckled. "I think you made that impossible," he said. "I'm not as young as you are. My body—"

"Not now," Vin interrupted. He looked up, blue eyes meeting blue. "Later… someday…"

"Someday?" Josiah asked, reaching up to rest his hand on the back on Vin's head.

Tanner nodded. "Just want t' know that if I need…" Vin dipped his head. "If I need y' again… someday… you'll be with me again…"

"Vin," Josiah said softly, "I'll always be here if you need me. You hear me? I'll _always_ be here for you. But I won't be a fuck-buddy."

Vin nodded. "Don't want one."

"This is all going to work out, you'll see," the older man assured him. "Give Chris a chance…"

Vin squeezed Josiah, his doubts all too clear to the profiler.

"Do you feel better than you did last night?" Josiah asked.

That brought Vin's head up and he looked at Josiah, nodding. "I do."

"Good," Sanchez replied. "That mean you're hungry, too?"

Vin thought for a moment, then nodded again. "Starved."

That put a smile on the older man's face. "Well, then, how do pancakes sound? I'll even make cinnamon apple pancakes…"

Vin smiled. It wasn't his usual smile, but it was a start, and Josiah was grateful that their lovemaking the night before didn't seem to have had a negative impact on Vin, or on their relationship. In fact, they seemed to be even closer, and for that he was grateful.

Then he realized that Vin's cock was stirring.

"C'n I ask a favor 'fore we go eat?" Vin questioned, the tone of his voice telling Josiah he should run now.

"I guess so…"

Vin's smile widened. "Think maybe y' could return the favor?"

Josiah flashed a toothy grin. "I think that could be arranged… if you'll fry us sausage while I do the pancakes."

Vin nodded. "I c'n do that."

"Figured you could," Josiah said, pushing Vin over and reaching for the man's almost-hard cock. "But first we have to deal with this… then take a shower."

"Together?" Vin asked, his eyes closing as Josiah began to stroke him.

"Chris is going to be one lucky man," Josiah breathed, dipping his head to take Vin into his mouth.

"Oh, God!" Vin gasped, hips pressing up.

It didn't actually take long before Vin was coming, calling out Josiah's name as he did. And the older man knew he'd never forget what that sounded like, not for as long as he lived.


	16. Clueless

**Tuesday, 10:51 a.m.**

Chris waited impatiently while Buck gathered his things from his hospital room. JD had gone to move the Ram to the curb so Chris wouldn't have to walk too far, and Nathan was talking to the orderly, who was waiting just inside the room with a wheelchair.

"Okay, got it all," the ladies' man announced.

"I've got your prescriptions, too," Nathan added.

"All right, then, let's get the hell out of here," Chris said, sliding off the bed and walking a little stiffly to the wheelchair and taking a seat.

The orderly wheeled him out to the sidewalk, where JD was already waiting for them. He grinned and took the plastic bag Buck was carrying, trading it for the keys to the big black pickup.

Wilmington walked around to climb in behind the wheel, while Nathan and JD got Chris into the passenger seat. When the blond was settled, with the door shut and his seatbelt in place, he pulled slowly away.

Nathan and JD would be following them in the former medic's car. Buck's truck was still out at the ranch, left there after he and JD dropped off groceries and picked up the Ram for the trip to the hospital to pick Chris up.

Chris remained silent until they were on the freeway, but then asked, "You know how Vin's doing?"

Buck shrugged a little and said, "Know he's been talking to a doctor at Summit, but he hasn't come in to the office yet."

Chris nodded, but he didn't reply. Several mile markers later, he asked, "Any luck finding Vine?"

Buck shook his head as he said, "Not yet. Ezra's been on that like a dog with a bone. If Vine can be found, Ezra's going to find him. JD's been working with him, too – computer stuff I can't follow, but they know what they're doing. It's just gonna take some time. The guy's good, and he's gotta know we're looking for him."

"Josiah staying with Vin?"

"Actually, Vin's been staying with Josiah at his place," the ladies' man explained. "Nathan's been checking in on him, too, but now that you've been sprung, I suspect Nate'll shift his focus."

That brought a thin smile to Larabee's lips. "Man needs to have a couple of kids to keep him occupied," he muttered.

"If ya ask him, he'll tell ya he's already got six."

That prompted a snort from the blond, but he didn't say anything. He'd been talking to Dee as well, but she wouldn't tell him about how Vin was doing, just kept telling him that he was making progress.

"Doctor say when you can come back to work?" Buck asked.

"Thursday, if I'm not too sore; Monday if I am," Chris told him.

"Now, ya know, if it was me, I'd be good and sore… get me a long weekend to enjoy."

"Hell, if I'm stuck out here for five days, I'll go stir-crazy," Chris replied.

"Spend some time with the horses, relax. Hell, stud, you earned it."

Chris glanced out the passenger side window and watched the landscape passing by. If he could get Vin out so they could talk, then he'd take the time, see if he couldn't reassure Tanner that he wasn't holding him responsible. Maybe they could get back to the easy friendship they had managed to build.

He shook his head, amazed that he'd only known the man for a little over four months. It felt like he'd known Tanner his whole life, and he knew Vin felt the same. Or at least he had… There was no telling what he was thinking or feeling right now. Having seen the completed reports that detailed what Vin had endured, he wasn't sure he blamed the man.

"If I do take the rest of the week off… you guys want to come out on Saturday, maybe barbecue some steaks and play some poker?"

Buck grinned. "Well, I guess I can reschedule my date with Bambi, free up the day…"

"Bambi?" Chris echoed.

Buck grinned and wagged his eyebrows. "Massage therapist. Her hands are pure magic. Mmm…"

Larabee shook his head. "You ever gonna settle down?"

"Doubt it," Buck replied. "Besides, you wouldn't want me to deprive all those lonely ladies out there, now, would you?"

"You're a real humanitarian," Chris responded.

"Huwomanitarian you mean," Buck corrected.

That actually got a laugh from Chris, but he shook his head and said, "Same ol' Buck."

"Always."

Silence fell between the two men again, more miles passing by before the ladies' man ventured a question of his own. "You thought about what you're going to do about Vin?"

"What do you mean?" Chris asked.

Buck kept his gaze focused on the road ahead of him as he replied, "You know what I mean. That boy, well, he's got feelings for you, and you damn well know it."

"You been talking to Josiah?"

"Some," Buck admitted, nodding. "We're just worried about him, that's all."

Chris was silent for a long moment, but then he said, "Hell if I know. I want to make it clear to him that I don't blame him for anything that happened, that I appreciate what he did for me, but, damn, Buck, the rest… I have no earthly clue what to say or do about that."

"Well, one thing at a time, huh?"

Chris nodded, but then asked, "What would you do?"

The ladies' man shot Larabee a quick look. "Hell if I know," he echoed, then added, "but knowin' there was someone out there who cared that much about me, well, that would make me feel pretty damn special."

That had Chris staring out the passenger side window again. He felt special, that was true. Knowing someone loved you made you feel special, but if he couldn't return those feelings it just wasn't fair to Vin. He snorted softly. Hell, they'd already been accused more than once of sounding like an old married couple, and it was true he felt more comfortable around Vin than he did anyone else, even Buck. It was the same kind of comfort he'd felt when he'd been with Sarah, but he didn't look at Vin like he'd looked at her. It was different.

Because he _was_ a man.

But he loved Vin, no doubt about that. Nothing wrong with that, either, he told himself. Not a damn thing. But it wasn't the same kind of love he'd felt for Sarah, either. It couldn't be. He was a man. He fell in love with a woman. He'd loved being with women, especially Sarah.

But if he took sex out of the equation, then he really couldn't feel any difference between what he felt for Vin and what he had felt for Sarah. So it wasn't brotherly love, or friendship love. It was real love, whatever the hell that was. But then, when he brought the sex into it, everything fell apart in his head. He'd never thought about doing anything with a man. He didn't care if there were men who did, but he wasn't one of them.

He sighed. _Damn_. He really didn't have a clue what to do.


	17. Friends

**Saturday, 9:13 a.m.**

Josiah walked into the living room to find Vin stretched out on his sofa, apparently sleeping, but he suspected Tanner was just delaying the inevitable. One way or another, however, he was taking Vin out to the ranch today. It was time for the man to face his fears.

Over the past few days, Josiah had made sure that every member of the team dropped by his place, giving them each an opportunity to see Vin, and Vin a chance to see that no one had changed his opinion of him because of what had happened. The meetings with Buck and Nathan had gone the easiest, since both men had been regularly dropping in to check on Vin since this had all begun.

The meetings with Ezra and JD had been a little more nerve-wracking, for both of them.

Ezra had come out Wednesday, parking in the driveway behind Josiah's Suburban and climbing slowly out of his Jag. He'd walked to the front door, pausing on the wide front porch to admire it, and those of the profiler's neighbors. It was a quaint neighborhood – peaceful and comfortable in a homey way the undercover man's condo complex could never hope to be – and Josiah had wondered if Ezra wasn't a little envious.

But before Ezra could knock on the door, Josiah had seen Vin open it and step out onto the porch, looking like a boy who'd just been sent to the principal's office. Blue eyes were downcast, and Tanner had shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot as he'd waited for Standish to speak first.

Ezra had gestured to the comfortable chairs Josiah kept out on his porch and the two men had sat.

The profiler had decided to let them talk for a while, alone, so he'd withdrawn to make some fresh coffee and find a snack they could all enjoy.

When he'd finally gone out to join them with coffee and crumb cake he'd prepared in the microwave, Ezra had just finished telling Vin about Vine.

"So, you see, there was nothing you could have done to stop this from happening. Mr. Vine is clearly deranged," Ezra had concluded.

Vin had nodded. "Reckon you're right," he'd said quietly, "but there had t' be some reason he picked me, how he knew takin' Chris—" He'd cut himself off, his cheeks going red as he'd looked away from both men.

"Vin," Ezra had said, "it was clear from the first day you and Mr. Larabee met that there is a special bond, a special relationship, between the two of you. Different people are going to understand that relationship in different ways. Vine wanted to see it as a purely sexual bond, which it is clearly not. That was his interpretation, nothing more. You bear no fault in this, none at all."

Vin had looked up, briefly meeting Ezra's gaze. "'Preciate that."

"I'm simply stating the truth."

Vin had looked down at his coffee cup and asked, "Just couldn't take the chance. I heard him. Chris, I mean. He—"

"Vin, there is no need for you to justify your actions to me," Ezra had said, interrupting.

Tanner's head had come up and once more he'd met the undercover man's eyes. There had been no judgment there, just sympathy and friendship, and he'd felt his eyes beginning to sting.

Ezra had leaned forward, squeezing Vin's shoulder. "You did what you felt you must. Mr. Larabee is lucky to have so good a friend."

They had settled back after that, talking about other things for almost an hour. Then Ezra had excused himself to leave, having promised to stop by the office to see what JD had managed to find.

The following day, it had been JD's turn to drop by, and Josiah had to admit he was more nervous about this visit than any of the others. In part, that was because JD hadn't talked about what he was thinking or feeling with anyone, not even Buck, who, the profiler knew, had made a concerted effort to determine what was going through his roommate's mind, but to no avail.

Josiah had opened the front door to let the younger man in when he arrived, then taken him back through the kitchen to the small enclosed back porch. Vin had been out in the back yard, playing with Bear, who, the sniper had discovered, had figured out how to open the latch on the gate separating his yard from Josiah's. The big Chow-Golden mix now had trotted around the sniper, his head up, his ears pricked forward and his curled tail fluttering madly as he'd waited for Vin to toss the plastic squeaky toy he was holding.

Vin had drawn his arm back and throw the six-inch-tall postman (a gift from the mail carrier) as far as he could.

Bear had darted after it, snatching it up and making it squeak loudly as he'd carried it back to Tanner, dropping it at the man's feet and letting him know he wanted him to toss it again. And Vin had complied, several more times, before Bear had decided to keep the toy for himself. The big dog had plopped down in the open gateway and happily chewed on his toy.

Vin had turned and walked back to the porch and his nearly cold cup of coffee. Seeing that JD was there, he'd squared his shoulders and tried to keep his head up.

As soon as Vin stepped up onto the porch, JD had been on his feet. He'd stepped forward and wrapped Vin in a heartfelt hug, saying, "What happened to you must have been terrible. I'm really sorry, Vin, but we're going to find him, I promise."

The younger man's sincerity had made Josiah's chest swell with pride. He'd been a little worried about JD, but now he knew he need not have been. What he'd been reading as discomfort with Vin's actions – and, he feared, Vin's motivations –had been just another example of JD's empathy. He'd been imagining himself in Vin's shoes, and finding it an uncomfortable, painful place to stand.

They'd all sat, talking about a lot of different things, but always coming back to what had happened, and how Vin was doing. Tanner had been, in some ways, more honest with JD than with anyone else, and Josiah hadn't been able to help but wonder if that wasn't the result of the fact that JD had shown no hesitation about touching the sniper. The rest of them had been more careful, probably overthinking the situation and, as a result, keeping more distance, when maybe what Vin had needed more than anything else was that physical reassurance of their friendship and support.

It was a mistake he had planned to remedy as quickly as he could.

JD hadn't been able to stay long. He and Ezra had had new leads to follow up on and he hadn't wanted to leave them to the others.

"Not that they couldn't do it, but it's computer stuff, and, well…" he'd trailed off and shrugged.

"You'd rather you do it so it gets done right the first time," Josiah had supplied for him.

JD had looked a little sheepish as he nodded. "Yeah, basically."

The look on the younger man's face had told the profiler that Vine had more to worry about from JD than he did most of the others.

After JD left, Vin had remained on the back porch, watching as Bear had begun a new game, chasing the birds and bees he could find in the two big backyards.

"Feeling better now?" Josiah had asked Vin.

And Tanner had nodded. "Never really had friends I could count on before. Never reckoned I'd find any, neither. But I guess I did."

"You guess?" Josiah had questioned.

Vin had looked over at the profiler, his eyes full of sadness as he'd said, "Think they'll all feel the same when they figure out how I feel about Chris?"

Josiah had offered him a shrug and said, "I don't think that's going to change their minds, Vin. I know, and Buck knows, and Nathan, too, and it hasn't changed our minds. And whoever really knows what Ezra knows?"

That had won him a small chuckle from the sniper. Vin had considered his words for a moment, then nodded. "Hope you're right. Ain't something JD's gonna think about until somebody tells him."

"Probably true."

"You ever gonna ask me?"

"What?" Josiah had questioned, honestly at a loss.

"If I'm gay."

The older man had thought for a moment and then said, "It crossed my mind, I'll admit, but I don't think it matters."

That had surprised Vin and his eyes rounded. "It don't?"

"Why should it?" Josiah had asked. "If you are, does it make you any different than if you're not? Or if you're a bisexual? Or… what's the new label? Queer? I know Vin Tanner. He's my friend. He's also a damn good sniper, a cocky Texan, and a mediocre poker player. Whatever else he is, well, it's just part of the package, and I've already decided the package is just fine by me."

Vin had shaken his head. "They must've called you a flower child at some point, right?"

Sanchez had chuckled. "Well, I missed that generation by a few years, but I like to think that if I'd been a young man at the time, I would've fit in rather nicely – as far as the philosophy of life goes."

Vin had smiled a little and nodded. "To be honest, I've never been sure what the hell I was… just me."

"And that's good enough for anyone, Vin," he'd told him. "Trust me."

And now, walking over to the sofa where the sniper lay, Josiah stopped and said, "Can't hide forever, son."

Vin's eyes opened and he looked up at the profiler. "Y' sure?"

Sanchez nodded and offered him a grin. "Come on, it's time to go."


	18. First Steps

**12:23 p.m.**

The drive out to the ranch seemed both longer than Vin remembered, and far too short. He fidgeted the entire way, and Josiah left him to it. When they arrived, the profiler parked behind Vin's Jeep and climbed out, waiting until Tanner did the same. Together, they walked to the front door.

Before either man could ring the doorbell, the door opened and Buck smiled at them, saying, "Well, come on in, boys! The steaks are on and JD's got some new video game set up in the living room, if you want to give it a go."

Vin nodded, hoping he might be able to lose himself in that for a while. The longer he could avoid Chris, the better. When they reached the living room, it was just in time to hear JD beat Nathan at the new game. The former medic threw up his hands and groaned.

"I believe you owe me ten dollars, Mr. Jackson," Ezra told the Black man.

Nathan fished out his wallet and paid Standish.

Seeing the newcomers, Ezra smiled and said, "Ah, fresh blood."

Josiah held up his hand, saying to Ezra, "This old dog is smart enough to leave these new tricks to the youngsters, so don't be planning to liberate any of _my_ cash."

Ezra's expression turned decidedly predatory as he replied, "Well, not until the poker game, anyway."

"C'mon, Vin," JD called, "take a look at this, it's _awesome_."

Vin smiled thinly and made his way over, quickly getting caught up in the excitement of the video game. And, after one dismal failure to begin, he was giving JD a run for his money.

Less than an hour later, Tanner heard Chris' voice announce, "Come and get 'em while they're hot!"

His hands froze and he swallowed hard. Turning, he glanced across the room at the man who had spoken. His mouth went dry and it was suddenly hard to breathe. He dropped the game controller and rose unsteadily to his feet.

The others all pushed to their feet as well, starting out of the room.

Vin followed them, his body operating on autopilot. His mind, however, was lost in the vision of the man standing in the doorway. Vin knew every detail, every gesture, every movement. And, when green eyes shifted to him, he froze, unable to move a single muscle. He had a sudden, sharp empathy for every antelope on the savanna when it saw the lion for the first – and last – time.

As the others filed past him, Chris said quietly, "Give us a minute, okay?"

Josiah nodded, he and Buck taking over, leading the way out to the deck where their barbecue lunch waited for them.

When they were gone, Chris crossed the space, stopping just in front of Vin. He smiled, then reached out and pulled Vin into a hug, saying simply, "Thank you."

Those words and that action just weren't what Vin had been expecting, and he didn't know how to respond. He pulled back slightly, and Chris released him.

"You all right?" the blond asked.

Vin nodded. "You?"

Chris nodded. "Few bruises still left, but that's about it. You?"

"I'm fine," Tanner replied, his gaze darting past Chris to the doorway, and freedom. "We best get out there before the food gets cold."

Chris frowned slightly, but nodded. Josiah and the doctor had said he'd need to let Vin set the pace for a while and he was willing to do that – for now, at least. But as Vin moved past him, he said, "I just want you to know that I don't blame you for anything that happened to me. None of this was your fault. It was Vine's. What you did… Man's lucky to have someone who'd do that for him. It takes— well, we're family," he said, not liking the choice of words, but unable to come up with something better on the spur of the moment.

Vin didn't look at him, but he nodded. "Couldn't let y' get hurt, that's all."

"Wish I could've done the same for you, Cowboy," Larabee replied.

Vin nodded again, then headed off down the hallway, needing to escape before his fragile emotions got the better of him. And Chris watched him go, wishing he could have said more, done more, but honestly not knowing what that "more" might have been.

The doctor had been right; it was going to a long, bumpy road, but he was willing to take the journey – for Vin. For the promise of what might lie down that rocky path, even if he himself couldn't even begin to fathom what it might be right now.

Yes, he'd take this trip, because it was for Vin. And, he thought as he moved to follow the sniper, maybe for himself, too.

%MCEPASTEBIN%

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part II is "Through the Glass Darkly."


End file.
